Note: Ain't Slayed Nobody is produced for the ear and includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors. BLEEKER TRAILS, EPISODE 6: BLOCK PARTY cuppycup (Keeper): Ain’t Slayed Nobody is a produced actual play podcast intended for adults and may contain material that some people find disturbing. Please see the episode notes for content warnings and listen with care. Bleeker: Oh. There you are. Good morning, troop. I was just coming to find you, Victor. And I see you've brought Luna and Gertrude. Gertrude: *everyone talks at once* cuppycup (Keeper): Ok. Ok. One at a time. One at a time. Victor: Lucy is dead. I know it. It's been days. That lanky bastard with the dodgy mustache. He's in on this with Pinky! He's not to be trusted. Luna: *speaks rapidly in Spanish* Bleeker: Was that skunk? Victor Skunk? Victor: No, no. Luna agrees with me. These new acts, they are a liability. Four of them killed a man at the train yard, then had lunch. That's two deaths in one week that we know of. You cannot be serious sending them away to represent us. They will kill again, mark my words. Luna: No, Victor. Son tres muertes. Bleeker: Yes. Yes. Pinky vouches for them, especially Moni and Julius. Now, Moni is a gamble, I'll admit. Gertrude: They're all weak, Bleeker. And where is the so-called strong man? Is he done crying? Wait, what's that? I think I hear him crying. Next time you try to replace me, Bleeker, I'll break your new toy instead of playing with them. Now, for the last time, I need to talk to you alone. Bleeker: Yes. I know all about your alternative act, Gertrude. Quite the crowd pleaser. And I'm a fan of the gunslinger's moxie. I think they could lead. Oh, we need to work with what we have. It's not like the good old days when the marshals were paying. That whole cult thing with the camel scared them good. I think it's still out there, you know? Luna: Tu obsesión con la historia de Ellie Bishop es estúpida. Lucy está muerta. Ellie está muerta, y Pinkie? No! Bleeker: Luna! ('DEAD MAN WALKING' BY CODY FRY PLAYS) ♪ I AM A DEAD MAN WALKIN' ♪ I SEE THE LIGHT COMIN' ♪ AND IT FEELS WARM ON MY FACE ♪ BUT I CAN TELL IT'S GONNA BURN ME DOWN cuppycup (Keeper): While Milford's remains are carted off by the doctor, Patience, Moni, Chester and Eli are left to contemplate their actions. Professor Bleeker requests a group performance to evaluate the chemistry, watching your skillful yet scandalous acts on stage. He sleeps on it before making any final assessments, asking you all to assemble in the morning to be handed your assignments. The four of you now wait for the professor in a small side tent. Moni: Chester, are you okay? Bridgett (Moni): Chester is injured, right? cuppycup (Keeper): He is. He lost 3 HIT POINTS, running around in circles on all fours. Brandon (Chester): I'm doing fine. Chuck (Eli): I'm going to reach into my sleeve and start pulling out scarves. cuppycup (Keeper): Of course you are. Chuck (Eli): I'm trying to just stop the bleeding. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah. You'll need a bunch if you're going to wrap up everything. Chuck (Eli): I got it. This is the infinite scarves trick. I mean, they just keep coming. cuppycup (Keeper): Give me a FIRST AID roll. Chuck (Eli): I FAILED. cuppycup (Keeper): *amused* Ok. Yeah. Chuck (Eli): 69. *chuckles* Bridgett (Moni): Niiiiiiiiice. cuppycup (Keeper): You are off to a good start. Chuck (Eli): I like the idea I'm gonna slowly start putting the scarves back in my sleep, and it's clear that this is going to be, like, a whole fucking thing. It's going to take a while. cuppycup (Keeper): And they're all bloody. Chuck (Eli): Oh, yeah. And I'm like "shit." cuppycup (Keeper): I'll let one more person try to help without PUSHING the roll. Bridgett (Moni): Awesome. Moni: You know, this would go a lot better if I could shave these areas. Chester: Nope. It's ok. Moni: Nope, understood. cuppycup (Keeper): I'll give you a BONUS if you let her shave you. Chuck (Eli): As soon as she says that, like, Eli produces one of his knives real quickly. cuppycup (Keeper): Amazing. Brandon (Chester): No, thank you. Bridgett (Moni): She failed with a 65 over 60, but she will actually burn 5 LUCK on Chester. Brandon (Chester): Oh, thank you. cuppycup (Keeper): Are you sure? Because he's only going to get the 1 point. Bridgett (Moni): For sure. Brandon (Chester): Wow. Look at that. This is more a team building than we did all first season. cuppycup (Keeper): Chester, you're going to get 1 HITPOINT back. You're feeling a little bit better after the rat bites. Brandon (Chester): No shaving needed. Rina (Patience): Can Patience do FIRST AID by self-medicating with whiskey? Numb the pain? cuppycup (Keeper): Hmm. I'm not going to give you HIT POINTS for drinking whiskey. Rina (Patience): *disappointed* Ok. Chuck (Eli): If only life worked that way. I'd be very healthy right now. Bleeker: Good morning, all. I am delighted to see some of you looking refreshed. I'll cut right to it, shall I? Eli: By all means. Patience: I do believe so. Bleeker: Patience, I need you to join the first wagon. Without knowledge of what lies out there in the frontier, I fear we will need to lean on your familiarity with West Texas, and your skills with firearms may be the difference between success and failure. Patience: I think I'd be up to the task, if you think I can do it. Bleeker: I am certain that you are able, and while it may be against my better judgment, Dot has convinced me that Moni is an asset to you. Moni, you will be on the first wagon. Rina (Patience): Patience side winks at Moni. Bleeker: Oh, you fancy each other. Of course. The eye thing again. Patience: Mm hmm. Bleeker: And to be frank, I need somebody who can keep Moni interested in the assignment. Moni: *groans* Bleeker: We don't want her running off to join another circus. Bridgett (Moni): Oh, the look of annoyance on Moni's face is so stone cold right now. Oh, she's so annoyed. Bridgett (Moni): I think Chester will do admirably as a third wheel to round out the group. Brandon (Chester): Here we go! Rina (Patience): *amused* So we're going to have Patience, Moni and their dog. cuppycup (Keeper): Oh god. Bleeker: The three of you are needed at the Guadalupe Mountains, specifically, the salt flats and archeology dig near the southern peak, named El Capitan, has lost people to the mountain. Find these missing people and assuage their fears while learning as much as you can. We'll load the wagons for the traveling show, should anyone question your purpose. Bare essentials for up to two weeks should suffice. Rina (Patience): I'm going to down another glass of whiskey and then I'll go. cuppycup (Keeper): *amused* Ok. Yeah, that's fair. Rina (Patience): I have had a rough day. Chuck (Eli): And Eli is just sort of patiently standing there. cuppycup (Keeper): *laughs* Sure, yeah. Bleeker: Of course, Arcanum, I have a job for you, too. An important job. We've encountered a situation with another fresh talent. You may have seen him? The strong man in velvet. Rina (Patience): Both of Patience's eyebrows go up and they tilt their heads slightly in Eli's direction when they hear "velvet". cuppycup (Keeper): Bleeker notices this look and takes Eli by the elbow. Bleeker: Walk with me, Eli. I don't know what to expect for you, exactly, but I will pay you more than it's worth. Chuck (Eli): Eli did not need to hear anything else. He is following. cuppycup (Keeper): Ok. Bleeker: Our friend's name is Julius. Brilliant fellow, but he got into a scrape here in Junction, so I urgently sent him away. Since then, I've been wracked with guilt for sending him alone. I want you to find him and help him if necessary. You'll take the next train to a small town just east of here called College Station. Eli: Sounds like a shithole. cuppycup (Keeper): *amused* Well, let's check on College Station. Deep in the steam tunnels beneath campus, Silas, you stare at the human tufts of hair amongst rat bodies and stacked crates. Your mind flickers back to the center pit, overflowing with the rats' detached heads. And you decide to carefully close the door on this particular nightmare instead of venturing further inside. London (Julius): Perhaps we try to follow the directions as best as we can. cuppycup (Keeper): Ok, let's find out what your best looks like. You've gone way off the path to the jail suggested by those cadets at the hazing ritual, so give me a NAVIGATE roll. Both of you can do it. Wes (Silas): Oh, man. Ok, I got an 8. cuppycup (Keeper): That seems good. Wes (Silas): That's a HARD SUCCESS, son. cuppycup (Keeper): London, did you happen to roll an EXTREME? London (Julius): No. cuppycup (Keeper): Silas, it's easy for you to follow the rat blood back to the point where you deviated from the plan. The tunnel's narrow as they crawl upward and turn your shoulders, scraping the walls, forcing you to struggle past hissing pipes. On the 8, you can also pick up the cadets' directions and find that final turn. At last, you come to a sturdy, unmarked door, which blocks your progress. Wes (Silas): You wanna go in that door? London (Julius): Curiosity is getting to me. Wes (Silas): I know what I found in the last door, so I'm not going in the door. Don't let me stop you from going in the door, is what I'm saying. London (Julius): Julius wants to stand to the side and sort of creak the door open, not standing directly in front of it. cuppycup (Keeper): Unfortunately, when you try the handle, the door is locked. Wes (Silas): Oh, right. We have like 100 fucking keys. I'm going to thrust the keys at you, Julius, and go, Silas: Have at it. London (Julius): I'm going to quickly try to size up if any of the keys would fit, just like, you know, try to process of elimination it and then try a couple. cuppycup (Keeper): Give me a d20, like we did for Silas. London (Julius): Alright. 14. cuppycup (Keeper): The 14th key unlocks the door. Nolan did mention that he snuck into the jail a few times. And you still want to crack it open? London (Julius): Well, just very slowly. I don't want to stand in front of it. cuppycup (Keeper): Julius carefully pushes the door inward on its squeaky hinges. The bottom scrapes the stone floor. It's dark in there for sure. Wes (Silas): Silas isn't looking. I'm just going to stick my lantern in to see if that helps him out. London (Julius): I'll look at what he's showing me. cuppycup (Keeper): Swirling dust dances in the lantern light toward the back, piles of dingy off white smocks and strap jackets sit forgotten on tables at the edge of the light. You can see the bottom step of stairs leading up. The air smells moldy and echoes with the sounds of gurgling pipes. You can make out stacked chairs piled in front of heavy chained manacles hanging from hooks on the walls. Wes (Silas): Is that like a monocle, but like tactical monocle? cuppycup (Keeper): *laughing* No, like handcuffs. Wes (Silas): I've never studied restraint. This is how you know I'm not into BDSM. cuppycup (Keeper): *laughs* That's right. Are you going inside? London (Julius): Yes. Yes, he's going to do it. Wes (Silas): Can we take shit? London (Julius): Yeah, some cuffs might come in handy. Wes (Silas): Yeah. I'll take two manacles. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, sure. London (Julius): I'll take a pair. cuppycup (Keeper): Ok. Wes (Silas): So you want to go up the stairs? London (Julius): Yeah. Let's do it. Wes (Silas): Nah, I'm the ex-Pinkerton spy. I'll go first. London (Julius): Ok, ok. Wes (Silas): We're at, let's call it the top of the stairs. Is there a door here, cup? cuppycup (Keeper): There's another door, yes. Wes (Silas): Is it locked? cuppycup (Keeper): Of course it is. Silas: You want to trade places and maybe, maybe see if you can get that key right again? You're pretty good at that. London (Julius): And again, very slow and calculated. You know, no sudden movements. cuppycup (Keeper): You do hear a click on the 7th key. And since you did that slowly, it wasn't loud. London (Julius): Before I open the door, can I just, like, listen to see if I can hear anything on the other side? cuppycup (Keeper): Sure. Give me a LISTEN roll. London (Julius): HARD SUCCESS. Wes (Silas): Yes! Silas: What do you hear? cuppycup (Keeper): With your ear pressed against the cool metal of the door, you hear a disquieting rattle beyond. There may be 6 to 8 distinct voices that you pick out from the din of clanging metal on bars. It must be cells on the other side. London (Julius): Do you want to switch places again? Silas: Yeah. Let's do that. Wes (Silas): Before I go in that door, I'm going to draw my gun. cuppycup (Keeper): Ok. Wes (Silas): I just want it out. I'm not going to aim it. I'm just going to... You know what? I'm just going to have my hand on it. cuppycup (Keeper): Wait, so it's holstered or you drew it? Wes (Silas): It's holstered. I got my hand on it. If there's a chance to not get shot by them. Alright, I'm going to crack the door very... Is it squeaky? cuppycup (Keeper): You know the answer. Wes (Silas): Oh, goddamnit. Alright, then I just open it. Just open it. Just walking in. Fuck it. Silas: What's up, fellas? How's it going? cuppycup (Keeper): Stepping from the doorway into the corridor, you're assaulted by the rants and ravings of those locked up here. Prisoners: *all ranting and raving* Prisoner 1: I swear on the Lord, I'm a changed man. I'll never look at another mule like that again, I swear. cuppycup (Keeper): The unwashed prisoners wearing filthy white gowns pace the cells, shouting for attention. The one nearest you bangs a bucket against the bars, sloshing urine on the floor. Prisoner 2: *screams* Hey, I said my fucking bucket's full, you lazy assholes. cuppycup (Keeper): The man opposite him prefers to slam his head into the wall over and over. Prisoners: *raving* cuppycup (Keeper): At the end of the block, more stairs lead up and away from the racket. Prisoner 3: I ain't going to sleep again. That's when they getcha. cuppycup (Keeper): Give me a LUCK roll for Silas. Wes (Silas): Ooh. That's not good. I FAILED. I got an 84. cuppycup (Keeper): The man with the bucket has stopped his protest and stares at you with a leering smile. Prisoner 1: Well, who the fuck do we have here? Oh, you two might be the shortest and tallest men I've ever laid eyes on. And you found each other? Isn't that fucking precious? cuppycup (Keeper): Then he points at something on the wall at your back, putting a finger to his lips. Prisoner 1: Shhhh. London (Julius): Can I look and see what he's looking at? cuppycup (Keeper): As long as you stepped into the cellblock, you can do whatever you'd like. I'll take a LUCK roll for Julius. London (Julius): Alright. Wes (Silas): Come on, now. Come on. Come on, now. Come on, come on. London (Julius): EXTREME SUCCESS. 8 versus 60. cuppycup (Keeper): Ooh, that's going to be helpful. Wes (Silas): I'm going to die in this scene, but you're going to be just fine. London (Julius): I'll write a book about you. Wes (Silas): I can't wait. cuppycup (Keeper): Glancing to where the man is pointing, Julius, you see an alcove with a placard above the entrance which reads "Guard Station." The snoring inside leads your interest to a uniformed guard slumped at a round table. London (Julius): Ahhhhh. cuppycup (Keeper): His face is pressed into a pile of playing cards, partly obscured by tin mugs of stale coffee. In a back corner, an umbrella stand is stuffed full of truncheons. The sleeping guard twitches and mutters in a restless sleep. He lashes out, nudging one of the mugs closer to the edge before settling again. London (Julius): He's asleep, Silas. Silas: Do...do you sleep like that? Is that sleeping? London (Julius): You hear the snoring? Silas: He's jerking. I thought he might be passed out. Like sometimes you can, like, you know... You ever been to an opium den? London (Julius): You ever passed out after jerking? Silas: I call it Friday. It's.... I miss my wife, is what I'm saying. cuppycup (Keeper): *laughs* Jesus. Wes (Silas): Vigorously miss my wife. cuppycup (Keeper): That guy who was talking to Silas now leans in with his face pressed against the bars. Prisoner 1: Well, then, my new friends, best be about it. Right? What, are you going to get us the hell out of here or not? London (Julius): Well, hold up. Where's Ambrose? Prisoner 1: Well, I'm Ambrose. I was told you was coming, so I was keeping an eye out. Now, hurry up before more guards come back. Come on. You got lucky the first time. Yeah. Prisoner 2: I'm Ambrose! Wes (Silas): Is this going to be a Spartacus situation? Prisoner 1: Jonas, I will cut your fucking tongue out. Don't listen to that one. He's mad. He strangled his own dear mama. And you don't even want to know what he's done with her head. London (Julius): I don't know now! No, I can't PSYCHOLOGY this, I have a very low PSYCHOLOGY. Wes (Silas): Oh, then fuck it. Okay, then, yeah. Let's just let these fuckers out. Let's let them all out. cuppycup (Keeper): Wait. So does that mean you're trying to get the keys off of the guard? He has a ring of them dangling from his belt. Wes (Silas): Cool. I have a knife. I'm going to cut his belt and slide them off. cuppycup (Keeper): Oh, that sounds fun. Give me a STEALTH roll. Wes (Silas): I should be outstanding at STEALTH. Am I outstanding at STEALTH? Did I give myself good STEALTH points? Did I? Fuck, yeah! Alright, come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck! 88. Fuck, push...I am PUSHING the roll. London (Julius): Yeah! cuppycup (Keeper): As you creep up to the guard, the floorboard squeals in protest and you freeze. Now, how are you PUSHING this roll? Wes (Silas): I'm going to get right up on him. I'm going to take two more steps because I tried to do this way too far away. I'm going to get up in his shit, my knife is out, I'm going to go up his belt loop, like up under the belt loop, turn the knife and slide it down and then slide the keys down at the same time, to where in one motion I'm cutting the belt and the keys are coming off, and this guy has no idea that that happens. And if he wakes up, I am at the ready position to stab him between his 5th and 6th rib and make him drown in his own fucking blood. So don't, don't tell me I didn't think through this. I will pull the knife out in his lung, will fill with blood, and then we'll snap his neck. And then we're getting everybody out. I know this move. cuppycup (Keeper): You're, you're almost hugging him at this point. You're almost hugging him. Wes (Silas): I am up in his shit. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah. Ok. Wes (Silas): Alright, so I'm PUSHING the roll. I'm sorry, London. London (Julius): You got it. You got it. Wes (Silas): Boom, boom, boom! cuppycup (Keeper): Silas cuts the belt in front of the key ring, and it flops down the key, sliding off over the knife and onto Silas's wrist. In one motion, the guard violently twitches when you do this, spilling cold coffee and nearly falling off of his stool. And then he snores. Wes (Silas): Well. Well, actually, I want to confer, like, I think we need to talk this over. Silas: What do you want to do? I've got the keys. London (Julius): You just plannin' to let everybody out? Silas: I don't see why not. I mean, we came here to let one guy out and we let everybody out and it'll caused a lot of confusion. Nobody will know who we came to get. They can't pinpoint that it was us coming to get this one specific person. Everybody's out. No harm, no foul. London (Julius): That's very true. But do we even know who we're trying to find here? Silas: No. cuppycup (Keeper): I don't think Dr. Hackett gave Julius a physical description of Ambrose. But give me an INTELLIGENCE roll, see if maybe you spot a resemblance. Or maybe she told you something about his appearance in passing. London (Julius): Ok. Oh, can I, can I PUSH this? cuppycup (Keeper): Maybe. How would you PUSH this with INTELLIGENCE? London (Julius): I was going to think, you know, he just goes up like as close as he can get to the bar. It's like looking in, looking at each person, might even try to grab one and just, like, pull them closer, look them in the eye. cuppycup (Keeper): Ok. If you want to stare them down like toe-to-toe, right up to the cells, I'll let you PUSH the roll. London (Julius): Toe to toe. 40 versus 65. SUCCESS. cuppycup (Keeper): Of course, the guys are taunting you as you walk from cell to cell, sizing them up. Prisoners: "Alright, pretty boy, let us out here." "It's the first time I've seen someone looking to move in." cuppycup (Keeper): And you're looking at them. Most of these guys are too old, Julius. Prisoner 3: What the fuck are you looking at? cuppycup (Keeper): Hackett's son couldn't be over 30. The only one who fits the age might be the guy who was hitting his head against the wall. He's now on the floor, rocking himself with his knees tucked into his chest. London (Julius): Ambrose? Prisoner 1: Yeah? Yeah? London (Julius): Damn it. Not you. Prisoner 1: Alright, alright. You got me. I am not, in fact, Ambrose. Silas: We know. Prisoner 1: But I am only in here for loitering. Honest. However, I do know who you mean. I saw you lift those keys. So if you just let me out, I will tell you where he is, ok? How is that for a deal? Right? London (Julius): Hmm. I'll look at Silas. Silas: Alright. What do you got? Prisoner 1: Alright, alright, alright. I'll level with you. I'm in for cattle rustling, but I ain't a danger to you or anything on two legs. Silas: I'm not one to judge another man. London (Julius): It's a good thing we're not cattle. Prisoner 1: Fine. It was a bit of light arson, that's all. I was drunk. And now, now my family is going hungry. So you got to get me out, okay? I don't know your friend's name, but, but everyone has been making a fuss, alright, about some fella they brought in a while back, and I know where he is. And I bet you that is your Ambrose. If it is no deal, I must start hollering, and every pissant guard is going to be up in your shit like you squashed an ant hill, a fire ant hill, and you won't get out. They will kill you. Kill you like fucking killer ants. Silas: You know, if you step on the mound, they all go batshit shit, you know, there's not really a different reaction for different ants, you fucking psycho. Prisoner 1: Yeah. Some of them hurt more, though. Silas: They bite a little harder, sure. What are you getting at? cuppycup (Keeper): You could give me PSYCHOLOGY for Silas to get a read on this guy. He's already lied to you once. Wes (Silas): Oh, neat. All right, I SUCCEEDED. cuppycup (Keeper): He's desperate to get out, of course. But he seems to be telling the truth about the special prisoner and about alerting the guards. Wes (Silas): Ok. What are you going to do to help us? Danny: Alright, listen here. There's two more doors in here besides the one you walked through and the guards' room, alright? That one down the hallway. That's where your man's at. Now, you got to come back through here, you got to let me out, or I'm going to rain them hellfire ants down on you. I swear on my mama. London (Julius): He seems to be, as far as I can tell, telling the truth? Wes (Silas): Yeah, it feels good to me. What have we do, this stranger? What if we let you out now and you wait for us to come back through and raise hell so I don't have to stop on my way out? Danny: You got yourself a deal. Wes (Silas): As a sign of good will. I will let you out right now. Danny: What? Really? Right. Right. Think. Thanks. Say you came up the stairs. Is. Is that the best way out? Wes (Silas): Don't get any fucking ideas at all. Danny: Right? I'm just trying to get up to speed, mister. I'm here to help. I'll wait here and do what I can. Extra set eyes and all that. Gertrude: Yeah. Wes (Silas): I'm not letting you out anymore. London (Julius): Well, that was a switch up. Wes (Silas): Well, he asked too many goddamn questions. I'll let him out on the way out. London (Julius): I like the way you think, Silas. Gertrude: Oh, you're killing me. Danny: I might start screaming if you're like Clint, how can you let me out? All I did was bury a horse of Clint. Gertrude: Killed somebody he talks about all the time. Wes (Silas): I probably will if you shut the fuck up. Gertrude: No. Danny: You kill somebody. I swear. If I ever get my hands on you, I'm going to squeeze your head clean off the pencil neck of yours. Amon, he's lying. I'm in here for a robbery that went sour. It was all blown out of proportion. You. Got to believe me. London (Julius): You said there was a guy earlier. There was like in a corner. That could have been Ambrose. Gertrude: Yeah. cuppycup (Keeper): The guy with the bloody forehead. He's about the right age to be Hackett's son. Wes (Silas): You want to talk to him first? Gertrude: Yeah. London (Julius): Hey, you kid. cuppycup (Keeper): He rocks back and forth on the floor. I'll take lesson roles. London (Julius): Failure 73 versus hard success. Gertrude: We're going to die. cuppycup (Keeper): We're all going to die here. Gertrude: You're going to die, too. cuppycup (Keeper): We're all going to die. We're all going to die. We're all going to die. We're all going to die here. London (Julius): Listen, it's all right. It's okay. Hey, calm down. Gertrude: This is the last day. We're all going to die. cuppycup (Keeper): You're going to. Gertrude: Die. cuppycup (Keeper): You're going to die. London (Julius): If you don't stop this battle, then it will be your last day. Intimidate. Wes (Silas): Och. cuppycup (Keeper): Are you sure? London (Julius): Success? Yeah. cuppycup (Keeper): He recoils further into his corner, whimpering, and a fresh streak of urine slowly flows out from under him. We're all going to die. Yeah, yeah. We're all going to die. Gertrude: No, no, no, no, no, no, no. cuppycup (Keeper): His eyes are locked on yours, Julius. His head. A matted mess of hair and blood. London (Julius): Yeah. cuppycup (Keeper): And on your successful intimidate role, he turns to the wall nearest him and slams his head hard into it, falling limply to the ground as blood pools around him. London (Julius): Oh, my gosh. Are you. Gertrude: Ambrose? Wes (Silas): If it's Ambrose, he's not much use to us. Gertrude: Leave that poor bastard alone. cuppycup (Keeper): And get. Gertrude: Us out of here. Victor: Geneva. Hello? The spoon. That Geneva. London (Julius): The door to the door. Wes (Silas): If I walk up to that door and do a listen. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, you can listen at the door. Wes (Silas): I just want to make sure I'm only walking into the one person or the fuck. Hey, I can't hear much. You want to try? cuppycup (Keeper): If Julius tries, it's going to be a push. London (Julius): I'm more of the library use type. Wes (Silas): Okay. Can you read this door? cuppycup (Keeper): It could be the prison library behind the door. You will notice a three inch gap at the bottom of the door, large enough to slide plates of food under. Wes (Silas): Oh, so we're just dealing with a solitary confinement situation here. London (Julius): Makes sense. Okay, well. Wes (Silas): You want to. You want to unlock this thing? London (Julius): Yeah, you. I believe you have the keys from the guard there. Wes (Silas): Oh, well, you know, then shall I unlock this thing? London (Julius): Yes. Yes, please. And prepare yourself. Wes (Silas): I'm going to open the door. cuppycup (Keeper): The lock clanks open. And with a push, it feels stuck. Forcing it. You hear a tearing of crust like you've just opened an exhumed casket. Gertrude: Oh. cuppycup (Keeper): Oh. You gag as a fetid rot is released. And you uneasily stare into the darkness. Where someone moves in the small, squalid space. Wes (Silas): I'm going to brave the stench and walk in and go. Ambrose. London (Julius): Me too. Gertrude: Ambrose. cuppycup (Keeper): Several paces into the room. A barred cell keeps the inmate from the door sitting within on a stool. A prisoner is concentrating on his arms and hands with a frown. He bites at them, tearing free a chunk of his own flesh. He chews on it gleefully. The walls of his cell are painted with a smeared mixture of what you think is food, blood and feces. The artwork captures something of a many legged creature, perhaps a spider. It seemingly sits in this mural above a web. Its strand depicted by strips of filthy bed linen woven skillfully throughout the cell. London (Julius): Is this Catholic mythos or can I do it a colt on it? cuppycup (Keeper): The stained strands and threads of linen lead your eye to the focal point at its center, and it makes you quite uneasy to stare at this malformed creature and its many grasping legs. It clutches a yellow heart. Now Julius is high enough in a cult that you dismiss it as anything that you write about in books or research. And since your Cthulhu mythos is zero, that won't give you anything. You can't determine its significance other than you feel the need to leave. London (Julius): Lord have mercy. Wes (Silas): Ambrose. Gertrude: You aren't real either. Wes (Silas): I understand why you would think that. Because what is reality, anyway? It's all constructed from my own personal point of view. What you experience as reality is valid, as is what I and my friend here experience. They're all valid realities, and yet they all exist in the same objective truth, which is we're all in this room right now. Now, do you want to come with us or do you want to stay here and go bat shit insane? I don't give a fuck either way. Gertrude: You shouldn't be here. London (Julius): You are. Well read, Silas. I didn't take you for the type. Wes (Silas): I like postmodernism. cuppycup (Keeper): He has stopped biting himself. And he gets up shuffling to the bars. He watches you warily. Gertrude: Let's say you. London (Julius): Yikes. Wes (Silas): Well, Julius, you want to get the fuck out of here or what? What do you think? London (Julius): Should he to come with us? We're here to get you out of this place. Gertrude: Hmm. Danny: How long have you been standing there? Mm. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I know by now, if you were real, you wouldn't know my name. So you are in my head. London (Julius): No. I was told your name. Danny: Oh, I'll play along. Told by whom? I don't have any friends left. London (Julius): I was told by. By your mother. Danny: My mother is. Gertrude: Dead. Yes. Danny: I do know that. I'm sure. I'm sure I know that. Uh, unless we're all dead, that would be nice. Gertrude: Oh, yeah. London (Julius): But Professor Hackett. Danny: Mm hmm. Mm. Professor. Doctor. Like that. So they keep fucking with me. You keep fucking with me. I can't remember it all the fucker. I can't keep my story straight in my own head. It's. It's not mine to keep anymore. Wes (Silas): Ambrose, this is your life. cuppycup (Keeper): With a worried expression. He starts to gnaw at his shit smeared wrist. Uh. Wes (Silas): How much of him is left from his auto cannibalism? cuppycup (Keeper): He doesn't look good. You could give me a first aid or a medicine roll. He's scarred over his entire body and many of the wounds are festering. His head in particular is badly scarred. Danny: Hmm. You are, Andrea. Wes (Silas): Ambrose. Can I. Can I convince you that we're real? Danny: I'm highly unlikely, but I'll listen. Wes (Silas): Let's say we're not real. What would the harm be in walking out of here with us to unreal people? Nothing matters. London (Julius): Hmm. Silas has been reading Nietzsche. Maybe a little Kierkegaard in there as well. Danny: Nothing matters. Nothing matters. Nothing matters. Nothing matters. London (Julius): I don't know how to. How to convince him. Do we just take him out? Do we just handcuff him so he doesn't, you know. Wes (Silas): Oh, dude, we could. London (Julius): We got manacles. Gertrude: The manacles. Wes (Silas): We could put him behind him so he could stop eating himself. London (Julius): Exactly. And we can just carry him on out. Wes (Silas): How strong is this motherfucker? London (Julius): He's probably weak. Wes (Silas): And how covered in shit is he? cuppycup (Keeper): Well, he's dedicated his food to building up this beautiful mural, and he seems to be mostly skin and bone. Mm hmm. If you disregard his filth, you could lift him. Wes (Silas): Are you strong? cuppycup (Keeper): Oh, Julius is a literal, strong man. Gertrude: Okay. London (Julius): I'm fit enough to lift him on out of here if need be. So I think we just. We just get him out. Wes (Silas): All right, let's do it. cuppycup (Keeper): Well, you'd have to open the cell door, and I need to know the plan. London (Julius): Yeah, just sort of like sweeping him up, you know, just kind of wrapping around the arm. cuppycup (Keeper): Okay. You're going to pick him up and run. This could be fun. You do get a bonus tie with the strong as an ox pulp talent. London (Julius): Hard success, 17 versus 80. Gertrude: Okay. London (Julius): Julius is fumbling with the keys, checking one, checking one. And as soon as he finds a match swings the you know, the cell doors open, reaches in, just sort of wraps his arm and like bicep around Ambrose picks him up and just starts walking him out. Sort of like a toddler in tow is what this looks like. Gertrude: Okay. Wes (Silas): All right. So I'm going to come in behind you and get the keys out of the door. Gertrude: Okay. Wes (Silas): And now I've got the keys and coming out behind you, I'm going to go unlock people's shit. You're going to go out the fucking door, am I right? London (Julius): Yeah, sort of. The same way we came in. cuppycup (Keeper): Oh, when Julius grabs Ambrose like that and pulls him out of the cell, he does begin screaming. Gertrude: Oh! Oh, shit. No, no, no. We have over here. Oh, me? No help. London (Julius): Can I just knock him out? Gertrude: Och doop. cuppycup (Keeper): Give me a fighting brawl. Roll for that one. London (Julius): All right. Success. 44 versus 50. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah. I'll let you knock him out with a quick punch on the success. You probably inadvertently already killed another prisoner. So I'll just take one point of damage. Wes (Silas): How would you kill him? London (Julius): Who? Okay. cuppycup (Keeper): What are you going to do with him? I'll remind Julius that Professor Hackett asked him to get Ambrose's records from the prison office. I don't know how important that is to you. London (Julius): Seeing those stairs. Maybe I can just kind of put him down. I'm like, Silas, if you need to cuff him, you can. I don't think he's waking up soon. Wes (Silas): He doesn't look like he needs any kind of cuffing right now. London (Julius): I need to find some files. I'm going to take a quick look upstairs. You can do whatever you need to do. Unlock people if you want. Or you can come with me. Wes (Silas): I'm going to go out there and make sure everything's copacetic outside. If. If not, I'm going to handle the guard. cuppycup (Keeper): And Julius just ran out across the cellblock and up the stairs. Give me a spot hidden for Silas. Wes (Silas): 37. cuppycup (Keeper): Silas Heading into the main cellblock, your hand comes away wet from the wall. You glance up, noticing a fresh red line leading from the basement door, which now sits slightly ajar to the stairs going up. Wes (Silas): Is the guard still there? cuppycup (Keeper): You hear the guard snoring away. Wes (Silas): Is the guy that talks to me still in his cage. cuppycup (Keeper): The Ambrose Pretender. Yeah. He's glaring at you. Danny: That's you. You want me to fuck out now? Wes (Silas): You tell me where these fucking lines came from. Danny: The basement door. He came back. You let the fucking ghost back in. Open this door. Come on, quick. He'll be back. Wes (Silas): What? Ghost? You can't say things like that. Fucking ghost. And expect me to fill in the blanks. You need to be more specific. Danny: Ain't the lifers talk about him? A guy called Cody. Used to be. He slipped out one night following the students. They said it was a massacre. You can hear him on the quiet nights haunting this place. He's going to kill us all. cuppycup (Keeper): He points down to the floor at a decapitated rat. Gertrude: Oh. Wes (Silas): I've seen that before. Danny: But he's using it like a fucking paint brush. Now, you. You give me the fuck out of here like you swore I will. Wes (Silas): If you clean up your language, young man, I will do that if you don't walk over there and unlock it like the little bastard. Fuck you. Get out of here. Gertrude: Oh, my God. Wes (Silas): Don't you run off. You're going to help us get the hell out of here. Because I let you out, and you promise me. And if you get away from me, I swear to God, I'll kill you and everyone important to you. Danny: Me? I am a man of honor. I live by a code C and I don't intend to keep killing. So you've got nothing to worry about with me. cuppycup (Keeper): He looks at you in your eyes and pats you on the shoulder. Silas. Give me a spot hidden. Gertrude: Sheesh. Wes (Silas): What? cuppycup (Keeper): So you felt sorry I was rolling as well. Gertrude: Okay. Wes (Silas): I see that you rolled a three. Gertrude: What? cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, I did roll the three, but we'll get to that later. Wes (Silas): What cup? I'm going to do whatever the opposite of that three. Is that the DM roll? Gertrude: Yeah. Danny: I'm just going to hang around here because I would very much like to fuck off into the tunnels now. Gertrude: Oh, man. Bro, I'm fucking damn proud. Wes (Silas): Hi. I know you're not Ambrose. Dumb ass. I'll let you out. And so I go late. I'm letting everybody out. I'm letting the whole fucking block out. Gertrude: Okay? Wes (Silas): And y'all get this guard and throw him in. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah. And I think by this point, Silas would be surprised that other guards aren't responding to this chaos. Everyone's fleeing, except for two prisoners and the guard. The guy who was saying, you're all going to die, he's not moving. Wes (Silas): That was also the guy that hit his own head against the wall. Right. cuppycup (Keeper): He does seem to be dead from the way his head has caved in. Gertrude: Yes. Oh. cuppycup (Keeper): That foreign guy is also sticking around. He seems to be dragging the guard back to his cell to lock him in. He's yelling at you, gesturing to the door. Gertrude: Yeah. Fucking shit. That was the. Victor: Fishbowl on these two new. Potentially some burst as a mortar per barrel. cuppycup (Keeper): The guard is groggy and wakes up slowly from this stupor. He's trying to focus on you. Gertrude: What? What? What are you doing? Wes (Silas): If you want to get out of here, you're going to answer some questions that I have. cuppycup (Keeper): You say that and you catch him right before he calls for help. Wes (Silas): Blink twice if you understand me. cuppycup (Keeper): He looks confused, but he does blink twice. Wes (Silas): Tell me how often these rats get decapitated. cuppycup (Keeper): But I don't. What? Rats. What? Wes (Silas): Well, you don't know what I'm talking about. There's a whole room of rat fucking confetti down the hallway, and I just saw one freshly get roasted. So, what are you doing? What's going on down here? I didn't do. cuppycup (Keeper): That. Or you're talking about the tunnels. I heard some things, but I don't go down there. Is this a dream? Wes (Silas): No. You too. You too. Is this not real? Is it not real? cuppycup (Keeper): It's okay. We'll wake up soon, I think. Wes (Silas): Tell me about the spider. cuppycup (Keeper): What? Spider. Fucking rats and spider. I don't like spiders. Wes (Silas): Talk to me about that fear. cuppycup (Keeper): Who are you? Wes (Silas): Batman? Gertrude: Oh, no. Wes (Silas): Using that fucking voice, it doesn't matter who I am. And no one's going to help you. I've let everyone out. You're the only one locked up. I have the upper hand. Tell me. Gertrude: Everything. Purple. I need help. Anybody? Guards. Oh. Wes (Silas): I open the cell. My knife is still out. I grabbed this man by the hair. I throw him against the wall and I put the knife up against his throat. And I go scream again. Victor: Don't get. I'm like, I did. cuppycup (Keeper): I'm sorry. Gertrude: I'm sorry. I don't know who you are. Why you're here. cuppycup (Keeper): Where are. Why am I. Am I awake? Wes (Silas): You don't need to know who the fuck I am. You need to tell me what I want to fucking know. cuppycup (Keeper): Why don't we check on Julius who ran upstairs to find the files? I think it's only fair that you'll eventually notice red lines along the walls, fresh like the ones you saw in the steam tunnels. London (Julius): It makes him sort of queasy and cautious, but he knows time is of the essence. cuppycup (Keeper): When you reach the second floor, you see an office off to your left and the open area splits off into a corridor on your right. Give me a listen. Roll. London (Julius): Let's see. Philly. Gertrude: Oh! Whoa! Oh! London (Julius): That's a lot. That's a lot of luck. No, I can't do it. Wes (Silas): It's real early for eight. Look. cuppycup (Keeper): The commotion downstairs seems to be growing louder, but at least the office is right here and the door isn't locked. London (Julius): Och, yeah, seeing that, I'll definitely take that. cuppycup (Keeper): You immediately notice a glass fronted display case. It holds antique firearms, hunting trophies. Ribbons in front of that is a large desk with a small ring of keys and scattered papers in plain sight. There are a half dozen wooden filing cabinets across from the desk. London (Julius): I'll take the keys. cuppycup (Keeper): Och, there are just three small keys on there. London (Julius): For, like. For like the file cabinets. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, probably desk drawers. File drawers, trophy cases. London (Julius): He's going to try the cabinets and move to the desk as, like, the last sort of step. cuppycup (Keeper): All right, Julius, this is your moment. Give me a library. Use roll. Gertrude: Yes, yes, yes. London (Julius): Oh, my goodness. Let's go. Go, baby. For this success, 73 versus 75. That was. Gertrude: Close. cuppycup (Keeper): You just got it. Nice. You also have quick study pulp talent so you can work through the materials you find efficiently. London (Julius): Yes. cuppycup (Keeper): You try hack at first and you do find a single page on Jane Hacket, but nothing about her son. From there, you find a drawer dedicated to prisoners of the special ward and come across a file for Ambrose Wilde. Ambrose looks fatter in this photograph, but it's certainly the man you knocked unconscious. Prisoner 792. He's an Austin native, born in 1867. He's serving three years for larceny and 30 years for murder. There are records of experimentation to calm the criminal mind. Initials V signed off to prolong the experiments, despite them being a failure. All eight subjects showed signs of insomnia and delusions. They were transferred from Huntsville, where group trials were abandoned and they were split up. Ambrose Wilde and Cody Pickering were sent here to College Station. These notes are dated May eight, 1893. So less than a year ago. London (Julius): Okay. All right. Is this all I find on Ambrose? cuppycup (Keeper): That's all you find on Ambrose. But you do also notice the file on Cody Pickering. He was the other transfer from Huntsville. This report makes similar mentions of delusions and insomnia. And the cell numbers are shown in the same block. London (Julius): If there's a picture like that, like the one of Ambrose, would I have seen this person? cuppycup (Keeper): You do have a photo and a physical description for Cody Pickering, but he's unfamiliar. London (Julius): Okay. cuppycup (Keeper): He looks like a dark haired, beefy guy with a mustache. London (Julius): All right. cuppycup (Keeper): Oh, and you did find that note on Hackett before you dug into the prisoner files. It's very brief. Gertrude: Hmm. cuppycup (Keeper): Dr. Jane Hackett. She is a suspect in a poisoning case, but the case was closed with instructions to destroy her file. London (Julius): Interesting. Who is she trying to poison? Does it say that? cuppycup (Keeper): It doesn't. There are question marks written in the margins and a different handwriting. London (Julius): Och och. It'll take that information and he'll try to go and meet up with Silas again. cuppycup (Keeper): When you say that, are you physically taking the files? London (Julius): I'm taking the files for sure. Gertrude: Och. London (Julius): And I want to take the note too, just so I have a little something. cuppycup (Keeper): Och, that sounds like blackmail. London (Julius): If I need to. Wes (Silas): Become, you might have to fuck it. Gertrude: Yes. cuppycup (Keeper): Where are you going next? London (Julius): I want to go meet back up with Silas downstairs. Did. Did I see where the blood trail led? cuppycup (Keeper): I'm so glad you asked. The blood trail wrapped around into the corridor on the right, which it's now in front of you if you're in the office doorway. London (Julius): I don't know if I want to go see. I'm going to go back with Silas. cuppycup (Keeper): Stepping from the office. You hear a door open and in the opposite corridor a man steps out smaller than Julius, but brought across the shoulders and heavy Bill. He wipes a bloody forearm across his sweat soaked face and overgrown mustache. The butcher's smock he's wearing is slick with blood. He wipes his cleaver on it, adding to it, and flicks off stubborn flecks of meat from the blade. Gertrude: Oh, fuck you. There's. What the. London (Julius): Fuck? I don't. I don't know. Does he see. Gertrude: Me? cuppycup (Keeper): You just looked at Coty Pickering's file and saw his photo. Julius, this is Cody. Gertrude: Oh, shit. London (Julius): All right, Cody. I know him now. There's lots of. I know. If there's not now, there's about to be lots of hubbub downstairs. Is he in my way? Can I make it downstairs? cuppycup (Keeper): He's currently standing down that corridor, so you might be able to make it down. His eyes roll upward in the sockets and he locks on to you, Julius. London (Julius): Julius is. He's leaving. It's speedy as possible for Julius. He's not a speedy person, but he's going to try his best. Because, you know what? If this guy catches up to him, that's fine. Downstairs is going to be more business with more people. We got. We got things to do. cuppycup (Keeper): You know, I've got to ask for a Dex role from Julius. London (Julius): Of course. Gertrude: Yes. Oh, my God. She's 25. Wes (Silas): You're fucking crushing it, dude. Gertrude: Yeah. cuppycup (Keeper): Julius, you're skipping steps with that long stride, working your way down to the cell block. You hear heavy footsteps behind you. London (Julius): Okay, cool. I want to go find Silas and Julius. cuppycup (Keeper): Here's the guard yelling for reinforcements downstairs. But there's something happening above you now, Julius. A door closes and then a struggle. Gertrude: Ooh. London (Julius): It's Cody or whatever his name is. Gertrude: Cody? Yeah. London (Julius): Cody. I don't think Julius would, like, turn around and go engage with it. I mean, can I glance back to see if it's guards? cuppycup (Keeper): Curious about the sounds from upstairs, Julius sees a shift in the dim light of the hallway. Something is thrown and lands heavy, catching the bottom half of the stairs. A guard's head with a shocked expression, clamps down the final few, stares toward you. London (Julius): Hell, no. cuppycup (Keeper): And it settles against your boot. I am going to say as you regroup. Gertrude: Last year. cuppycup (Keeper): To be so mad at me. Wes (Silas): You didn't do anything wrong. cuppycup (Keeper): As you regroup. Silas is going to realize that. His cult is missing. Wes (Silas): That's bullshit. Now I am mad. That is bullshit. Oh, why is my gun gone? I didn't take my gun out. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, the. The prisoner who hugged on you. Wes (Silas): No, he didn't. Gertrude: Huh? Wes (Silas): No, he didn't take anything. That's bullshit. cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, he got a three on sleight of hand and then ran off into the tunnel. London (Julius): Oh, no. Wes (Silas): I will fucking murder you. Wow. The prisoner that I let out stole my gun? cuppycup (Keeper): Yes. Wes (Silas): Then I have to kill him. London (Julius): This is juicy. cuppycup (Keeper): You are listening to Ain’t Slayed Nobody. 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