Note: Ain't Slayed Nobody is produced for the ear and includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.

Y'ALL OF CTHULHU, EPISODE 21: MY BELOVED MONSTER

cuppycup (Keeper): Ain’t Slayed Nobody is a produced actual play podcast intended for adults and may contain material that some people find disturbing. Please see the episode notes for content warnings and listen with care.

('DEAD MAN WALKING' BY CODY FRY PLAYS)
♪ I AM A DEAD MAN WALKIN' 
♪ I SEE THE LIGHT COMIN' 
♪ AND IT FEELS WARM ON MY FACE
♪ BUT I CAN TELL IT'S GONNA BURN ME DOWN

Brock: We have sealed the tunnels. Only the chosen shall witness the rebirth. We have seen the trickery of gods who wish to stop what we must do. We rely only on the stars.

cuppycup (Keeper): Ellie, you felt the wooden altar rumble with those explosions as blood sloshed around your body and grizzled bits of meat fell over you. The cloying air inside this box is thick with the taste of slaughter. As Colin Brock smiles down at you through the opening in the lid, he takes a step back, revealing the night sky above. It's filled with ominous black clouds, which flicker blue with sheet lightning. Through breaks in the Nimbus, larger stars are clustered more brightly than the rest. One sits alone like it's been misplaced.

Brock: Something's wrong with the prophecy! Look at the alignment. It's all wrong.

Alex (Ellie): Can I see more than I did before?

cuppycup (Keeper): There is more light entering the chamber through the slots where blood is flowing through and through that uncovered porthole. Mostly, you see blood.

Alex (Ellie): *sarcastic* Cool, cool. Things are looking up.

Brock: Bring me Kate or what's left of her. Now!

cuppycup (Keeper):  Ellie, after a minute or so, you'll hear chains rattling nearby and a growling.

Kate: I'll tear you fuckers apart!

Brock: Easy there, Kate. Shh. Get her down there.

Dust Devil: *screams* My face! Oh my fucking face! She bit me. I can't believe she bit me. *sobbing*

Kate: Oh, you bastards are lucky I only have one mouth.

Dust Devil: Is it bad? Oh, please tell me, it isn't bad, is it? Fuck!

Brock: Oh, shut up. Someone get her onto the altar. We're wasting time.

cuppycup (Keeper): And for an instant, you see the flash of a woman's face behind a curtain of tangled red hair, blood dripping down her chin.

Brock: Get down! Get. Down. *struggling*

cuppycup (Keeper): Her wild green eyes see you, Ellie, bathed in blood, and as she attempts to speak, a red line is drawn across her throat, showering you in new blood.

Alex (Ellie): Oh, come on.

Brock: Look at that. Look! The stars are right again! 

cuppycup (Keeper): Ellie is already in a BOUT OF MADNESS, so I won't call for a SANITY check here, Alex. But remember that this BOUT OF MADNESS made you feel powerful, more powerful than Colin Brock. You are a god, Ellie, or something close to a god. How are you interpreting what's happening here?

Alex (Ellie): Oh, man. Give me a minute.

cuppycup (Keeper): It's fine. Take your time.

Chuck (Johnny): I love the amount of thought going into this.

Alex (Ellie): It's hard to decide.

Chuck (Johnny): No, I love it. Genuinely.

Alex (Ellie): I think I want to perceive it as an offering. The blood is an offering.

Chuck (Johnny): Oh shit.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. Ellie you are reveling in this blood as it covers your body. I love that. Brock is peering down into the chamber again.

Ellie: I want more.

Brock: *chuckles* Wonderful. We will continue to call followers of the Dark Mother. Bring me Peter Tinkle.

Alex (Ellie): Oh, come on. *laughs*

Chuck (Johnny): I cannot fucking believe that that is the name, you fucking...*laughs*

cuppycup (Keeper): Come on. That's a good callback!

Alex (Ellie): No. *giggles*

cuppycup (Keeper): He was on the list from the Prestwick House!

Chuck (Johnny):  It is a good callback, but goddamn.

Alex (Ellie): *laughs* Oh, Jesus Christ. Wait, am I the Dark Mother?

cuppycup (Keeper): If that's what you choose to be, but you'd probably know that you're not her. You are Ellie.

Alex (Ellie): Good. I like to do my own thing anyway.

Brock: Peter, thank you for this. Maxwell Posey was a coward, but you stepped right in and did what needed to be done. You're a good man, Tinkle.

cuppycup (Keeper): Maybe to your delight, they help this man down onto the altar. But unlike the red-haired woman, he's not fighting at all. But this doesn't slow Brock down, and blood reigns down on you once again. You could swear you saw black mist escape his body. With each cut, you can feel the blood closing around your ankles as it grows deeper with each kill. Brock looks down on you again.

Brock: Look at you. My insatiable puppet. Soon, Ellie, you will help me finish the summoning and do what your father could not.

Ellie: Excuse me? Puppet?

cuppycup (Keeper): I only rolled 3 for the length of this BOUT OF MADNESS, and I think that hearing Brock call you a puppet and denigrate your father, that's going to bring you back to reality. Ellie you are trapped in this box. Blood is inching higher and higher and you are going to die here.

Alex (Ellie): OK, but is there anything I can even do?

cuppycup (Keeper): What do you have in mind?

Alex (Ellie): Can I pop the lid? Maybe with like a hard kick.

cuppycup (Keeper): I'll let you try. This is a heavy lid, so give me a HARD STRENGTH roll.

Alex (Ellie): 54. I need half, right? Nope.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. You kicked the lid as hard as you can, but there just isn't enough space in here to generate a lot of force. But this did seem to get Colin Brock's attention, and he's glaring down at you through that window.

Alex (Ellie): More blood. Now.

cuppycup (Keeper): *laughs* OK. Amazing. Brock immediately throws another man on top of the altar.

Dust Devil: Oh no, no, no. What the hell are you doing? Let me go, please. Please. I think...I think I have a family. Oh no. *sobs*

cuppycup (Keeper): The blood is now a steady flow filling this chamber.

Alex (Ellie): Can I use my new skills to, like, do anything? What about the points I got from the dreams?

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh sure. The CTHULHU MYTHOS. What would you like to do with that?

Alex (Ellie): I don't know, can I get help? I'm just going to call out for help, but like from deep within.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. You're gathering your will and channeling everything you've learned from the dreams, Ellie. You find yourself drawing on the inside of the box with blood-covered fingers, painting a ritual of contact. Give it a shot with a CTHULHU MYTHOS roll.

Alex (Ellie): Oh, dear God. 68. OK.

cuppycup (Keeper): You cried out for help with everything you had. But it's inaudible and nothing happens. Would you like to PUSH THE ROLL?

Alex (Ellie): Yeah. OK. This is not the way I die. Let's PUSH THE ROLL.

cuppycup (Keeper): How are you PUSHING THE ROLL? What are you going to do differently?

Alex (Ellie): Can I drink the blood?

Chuck (Johnny): *laughs* You've made choices.

Alex (Ellie): Let's go for it.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. You're going to drink the blood. But why?

Alex (Ellie): No. Let me get some of the blood in my mouth and spit it at the window. And Brock. 

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. I love the imagery so much that we have to do this. Maybe your defiance can stir something.

Alex (Ellie): OK. 31 this time.

cuppycup (Keeper): *surprised* Oh my God, your MYTHOS is thirty two. Ellie, you spit out the blood and it sprays the glass just above where this blood is funneling into the chamber.

Alex (Ellie): OK.

cuppycup (Keeper): And then a voice creeps into your ear.

The Stranger: Ahhhh. So you've decided to call on me after all these years, child.

Alex (Ellie): Yikes.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, let's check on Johnny, who was about to leave the forest camp riding on his new Dark Young, Kate.

Alex (Ellie): *amused* Let's go to Johnny.

cuppycup (Keeper): First, let's establish how Johnny is riding this Dark Young. There's not exactly a saddle and reins.

Chuck (Johnny): So what I'm picturing is that I'm trying to find like the centermost front...most two tentacles, and I'm sort of sitting between them and holding onto them, like one with each arm, starting to get my sea legs for this whole thing. I hope that there's not like a mouth right there, because I know there's a lot of mouths.

cuppycup (Keeper): You're right, there are a lot of mouths, but none of them are in your immediate vicinity on top of the Dark Young. But speaking of sea legs, give me a CONSTITUTION check for Johnny.

Chuck (Johnny): OK. 64. My CONSTITUTION is 55.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. I doubt you have that much LUCK left.

Chuck (Johnny): I do not.

cuppycup (Keeper): What you noticed, Johnny, as you're situating yourself, grabbing hold of these tentacles, is that your left ankle, the side where you've amputated your foot, begins to sink into the Dark Young's flesh.

Chuck (Johnny): Uh-huh.

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, it's as though your leg is melting into the top of this creature and its skin is clinging to your leg.

Chuck (Johnny): That's not good. Would you describe her exterior as being slimy or is she like a snake or where they look slimy but actually they're not?

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate has a tough, rubbery skin, but she's covered in pustules, and those are slick with viscous, black fluid. It's soaking your clothes, and the cloying dampness creeps up your legs. To hold on to Kate's swaying branch-like tentacles, you have to really sink your hands into a soupy black residue. It's sticky, and the smell of pungent, rotting fruit and milk is really strong, and your firm grip is popping some of the pustules.

Chuck (Johnny): Wonderful. OK.

cuppycup (Keeper): And of course, your leg is stuck sinking into the Dark Young.

Monster Kate: Hold on tight, little sapling.

Johnny: Oh, that's sort of sweet, Kate, I appreciate that. Kate, I seem to be having an issue with my foot, vis-a-vis your exterior carapace.

Monster Kate: I'll be your legs. Yours are insignificant.

Johnny: Now, I respect what you're getting at, ma'am. This will be like a temporary thing, correct?

Monster Kate: I assume you asked Mother if you could join me. I don't control how this works.

Johnny: Can I pull it back?

cuppycup (Keeper): You could try a STRENGTH check if this is bothering Johnny.

Chuck (Johnny): Oh, that will go well.

cuppycup (Keeper): You will need a HARD SUCCESS, at the risk of hurting one or both of you.

Chuck (Johnny): *disappointed* Oh.

Johnny: Alright, Kate, well, I apologize, but I'm going to see if I can fix this situation real quick. Oh, that's a 16. Hey, that's a HARD SUCCESS. Just barely.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, how are you going to do this?

Chuck (Johnny): Yeah, I think I'm going to grab my calf with both hands and see if I can yank it back out.

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, you do that. And just in time, before your leg really fuses into Kate's body, you tear your leg from the skin, opening a new orifice. It's bubbling with milky black fluid.

Monster Kate: Bastard. What are you doing up there? You bad fucking seed.

Johnny: Just extricating myself from the situation, I think we have it under control.

Monster Kate: I'm sorry. I lost my temper, but try not to do that again. I'll make you as comfortable as I can. Now, where are we going, my tiny twig.

Johnny: I like sapling better. What we're doing is we are heading to the town of Olvido. There is a very bad fella in that town, and suffice it to say that it is clear he is too powerful for me, and that's where you're going to come in and perhaps by our powers combined, we can resolve this situation and save what is left of my friends.

Monster Kate: I did try to go north before. My Mother sent me after someone called for her, but they've sealed the town. I could not enter.

Johnny: Good news there. I have taken care of that situation, so we ought to be right as rain heading in there.

Monster Kate: I am starving. Perhaps a light snack before we begin.

cuppycup (Keeper): She rolls one of those tentacles up and around the midsection of Paws, who's trailing behind.

Johnny: You know what? Yes, I think that you should feel up for the adventures ahead. However, that is a friend of mine, and it may be that he may be of some use to us in the trials ahead. Let's say we let you maybe catch a deer or something. I don't know much about the local fauna.

Monster Kate: Why hunt when there is fresh meat right here?

cuppycup (Keeper): And Kate throws one of her tentacles back and snatches Jeremiah's body from the ritual site.

Johnny: Oh, you know what? That's fine. I suspect he is a bit gamey.

cuppycup (Keeper): She whips that tentacle all the way forward, and you see his body broken, pulled apart and fed to several mouths at once. In a few minutes, all that's left is the noise of crunching and popping bone.

Chuck (Johnny): Jeremiah, you do not have a body now. *laughs*

cuppycup (Keeper): After 10 seconds or so, she vomits Jeremiah's body across the dirt. There's this thick black slime covering what's left of the pieces of this masticating body.

Monster Kate: Oh shit. Who was that? What are you doing?

Johnny: Well, you know, it was the time I thought that was my friend Jeremiah, but I suspect it is not him. I think it's a fellow we ran into by the name of Sparky, and I don't know much about him, but I'm pretty sure he's no good.

Monster Kate: Oh no. Mother, something is wrong here.

Johnny: Now, we're going to be all right.

Monster Kate: OK, I'm OK.

Johnny: Well, I don't want to comment too much about your size, I am a gentleman, but I suspect you need some caloric intake.

Monster Kate: We'll find someone to eat along the trail.

Johnny: Yeah, let's just follow that trail. We're going to come up where there once was a bridge, there is no longer, and then I'm going to see what you think about the situation.

cuppycup (Keeper): Now she's not the fastest creature in the universe and you do have a lot of ground to cover.

Chuck (Johnny): She's got to be faster than Sinead, was, though.

cuppycup (Keeper): She's a bit faster than a horse because her stride is so long, but she moves in a lumbering way, and the ride is unpleasant and jarring. At this pace, you'd probably arrive in Olvido in the dead of night.

Chuck (Johnny): Sure.

cuppycup (Keeper):  As you ride, Johnny, every so often, Kate uses her tentacles to brush your cheek or tousle your hair.

Chuck (Johnny): Oh, that's kind of sweet. I'm going to give her a reassuring pat as one would the mane of a horse you really like.

cuppycup (Keeper): Following about 10 minutes of riding, Kate scoops up Paws and rolls him in one of her tentacles so that she can carry him along and speed up the journey.

Chuck (Johnny): Aww. Johnny's menagerie continues.

cuppycup (Keeper): After about 2 hours of this bumpy ride, you've passed Bertie's barn again, and before long, the remnants of the bridge, the burned out posts, come into view.

Chuck (Johnny): Good deal.

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate's going to slow down as she approaches the ravine.

Monster Kate: And how should we cross?

Johnny: Well, I was going to ask you the same question. What would you say is your long jump capability?

Monster Kate: Hmm, I think I can do this.

cuppycup (Keeper): She just needs a REGULAR SUCCESS, and her DEX is quite good. 40 on the nose, that's a HARD SUCCESS. She clears the gap easily.

Chuck (Johnny): *surprised* Oh!

cuppycup (Keeper): As all of you land hard on the other side, you'll see the dust kick up and you're fortunate to even hang on, but you are back in Olvido.

Monster Kate: Did you see that, my bloom? I'm in better condition than I thought.

Johnny: Damn, Kate, you've been doing CrossFit? I'm just saying after this all settles down, maybe we get you some leggings. We'll give you a glow up.

Wes (Jeremiah): Fan art! 

cuppycup (Keeper): As Kate surveys this town, I need a SPOT HIDDEN.

Chuck (Johnny): It's a 95. No, I do not.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, you're not noticing anything helpful, not yet, but Johnny will realize that Kate seems distracted. Her body tenses up. She's looking off to the left of the main road toward the corral.

Monster Kate: Hey, up there, little tree. Do you mind if we stop here for a snack? I've held out as long as I can.

Johnny: You know, I feel like I need you absolutely battle-ready. And I don't think carb loading is the appropriate term here. Let's go get you a snack!

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate moves more quickly than you've experienced so far, and she tears through the fences in a burst of dust and splintered wood.

Chuck (Johnny): Fuck yeah.

cuppycup (Keeper): She rips through the horse barn and wraps up a dappled horse and a smaller brown horse in her tentacles. Without hesitation, she shoves them into two separate balls. And Johnny, you can hear and feel their bones snapping beneath you as you rock up and down.

Chuck (Johnny): *disgusted* Oh. 

Monster Kate: Tastes bloody lovely.

Johnny: Sorry about this, my equine friends. I am normally a lover of animals, but you know, we'll call this a means to an end.

Monster Kate: Oh, that's so good.

cuppycup (Keeper): A burst of bloody mist materializes with each crunch until she finishes her meal and trots back toward the main road.

Monster Kate: Thank you. I really needed that.

Chuck (Johnny): And that's where I would say, Does Johnny have any idea where to go?

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, you're not really sure.

Chuck (Johnny): OK. Do I hear anything like chanting or an explosion?

cuppycup (Keeper): Town is quiet. You aren't hearing anything in the stillness.

Chuck (Johnny): Hmmm.

cuppycup (Keeper): But as you ride away from the corral, there's this mess of footprints running in every direction, similar to when you were trying to track Jeremiah outside of the general store. And speaking of that store, you do see a man run out from behind that building. He's wearing white coveralls and carrying a torch. He hasn't noticed you lurking in the dark.

Chuck (Johnny): Sure.

cuppycup (Keeper): But let's go back to Ellie, who was experiencing a strange new voice inside the alter. The porthole is still covered in your bloody spit, but you can hear that they've begun sacrificing people more quickly. The bodies are hitting the top of your chamber, being hacked to bits, and the blood is pouring in through the openings. That blood is rising steadily now, spilling over the top of your robes, soaking it through your forearms are covered. Now you hear the crackling of stoked fires and the hiss of searing meat. The air in the chamber is stifling. This choking smoke starts to curl in through the openings. It's hard to catch your breath, but as this crowd of bodies passes over the altar and blood continues to fill the chamber, Ellie, your focus is on something else, that voice that crawled into your ear.

The Stranger: Oh, what's troubling you now, my child?

Ellie: I'm sorry, who are you?

The Stranger: You called upon the gods and they sent you a friend.

Ellie: OK, can you help me?

The Stranger: Well, of course I can help you. Will I help you, though? Well, that remains to be seen, my child. What is it you want?

Alex (Ellie): I would like to not drown in blood.

The Stranger: Oh, how perfectly charming.

cuppycup (Keeper): With a sickening lurch, you are no longer confined to the box. You're outdoors, the hot burning air of that altar chamber and those maddening chants are replaced with stale and oppressive silence. The sky is filled with gray clouds that stretch to the horizon. They veil you in the blue gray of twilight underfoot. The dead ground is littered with long shadows being cast from nothing, it seems. And it takes you a moment, but you realize that you're standing on a mesa in some kind of twisted desert, strange animal bones are sparsely scattered across the sand.

Chuck (Johnny): You've been hitting that peyote.

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, this might remind you of stories that you've heard about vision quests or something like that, Ellie. But you can't imagine what earthly animals these bones belong to. And from the edges of the mesa, you hear murmurs and notice crawling shapes, and the air around you is faintly phosphorescent, flickering like slow lightning and revealing strange things that swim in gray pools. Something wriggles beneath you, and then a rope of sand slithered away from your bare feet and above you. Strange birds are circling like vultures, but much larger. 

Alex (Ellie): cup, is this a hallucination, or did I actually get out of there?

cuppycup (Keeper): This feels much more real than a vivid dream. You feel present. And that voice again whispers behind your ear.

The Stranger: Well, here we are. I would have come sooner, but I've been so busy. You do understand, don't you Ellie?

Ellie: How do you know my name?

The Stranger: I've been with you the whole time. You may not know it, for I have many masks, and no doubt others take credit for my good deeds. But I am ever watchful of those who interest me. You only had to call upon me, and now, as you desire, you are free. Should I leave you to it, then?

Alex (Ellie): I want to look at him. 

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. You're going to turn to your left and see this man who's been speaking to you. All you can see of the stranger's face below the rim of his mocking black 10 gallon hat is a limitless wide smile that breaks across his gray skin like the rending of clay. His gaunt form is clad in a matching ink-black duster, its heavy folds groaning in protest against the wind that isn't there. Glimpses beneath the coat reveal amongst writhing shadows a twisted body. At his hip, bony fingers twitch above a pearl-handled long iron.

The Stranger: Well howdy, my Texas rose.

Alex (Ellie): Can I touch him?

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh God. Sure, you can. His skin is cold and rough and seems to move under your finger. Everything about him is unnatural to you.

The Stranger: Did no one ever teach you how impolite it is to leave a guest waiting for so long?

cuppycup (Keeper): Alex, I'm going to ask you for a SANITY check in seeing this man and experiencing this desert.

Alex (Ellie): Cool. I rolled a 61. Big FAIL.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, and I'll take a d4 for your SANITY loss.

Alex (Ellie): That's a 3.

cuppycup (Keeper): You've recently ended a BOUT OF MADNESS, but you're going to be entering a new one.

Alex (Ellie): Cool.

cuppycup (Keeper): You can feel the muscles around your larynx contracting like your mouth and throat are filling with water, but it's dry here. This is the desert, but you're getting a sensation like you're drowning in blood.

Alex (Ellie): Got it.

cuppycup (Keeper): I'll roll to see how long this is going to last, and I got a 10/10, so this is going to take a while.

Alex (Ellie): *sarcastic* Oh, great.

The Stranger: I suppose some might see your pensiveness as an admirable quality, but I'm afraid my schedule is rather full at the moment. Can we perhaps get on with it?

Alex (Ellie): God, I should have stayed in the coffin.

Ellie: Can you send me back? Not into the altar, but into the town of Olvido.

The Stranger: Oh, I am so sorry. I didn't realize you were that picky about the destination.

Alex (Ellie): Where am I?

The Stranger: This desert is home to outlaws and exiles who have no place else to go, and they are in desperate need of balance. A sheriff to hold them to account. Or rather, a deputy sheriff.

Ellie: I'm a sheriff now.

The Stranger: Of course you are.

Ellie: Will you help me?

The Stranger: Yes. That's why we're here.

cuppycup (Keeper): He sweeps his hand across this brittle, twisted landscape.

Ellie: I think I'm drowning in blood, though. Can you stop that from happening?

The Stranger: You seem perfectly all right to me. Who would drown you in blood? That all sounds rather rude.

Ellie: It's Colin Brock.

Chuck (Johnny): Ride the snake.

Alex (Ellie): OK, right.

Ellie:  I need you to kill my enemies.

The Stranger: Oh, wonderful.

cuppycup (Keeper): What happens next is quite interesting, Ellie. I don't know what you were expecting, but the shadows curl into wicked shapes and converge on a spot 30 yards away. The murmurs grow into feverish, gibbering and a hand bursts out of the blanched sand. Colin Brock is pulling himself free. He's dressed more like the man besides you than the cult leader in robes. He has a suit and a black duster. He stares over at you from beneath the shadow of his hat with beads of sweat around his mustache.

The Stranger: Is this who you were looking for? I'm sure you'll make quick work of him, my child, I have every faith in you.

Brock: Oh, Ellie, I wasn't expecting this from you. I thought we were becoming friends. Well, who am I to deny you a reckoning?

cuppycup (Keeper): Before you decide what to do, let's see how Johnny and Kate are doing back in town.

Alex (Ellie): Awesome.

cuppycup (Keeper): Johnny has spotted a presumed cultist running away from the general store, and he hasn't noticed you and Kate skulking in the dark yet.

Ellie: Uh, Kate, what would you say that your stealth ability is?

Monster Kate: It's not my top strength.

Johnny: I would imagine not.

Chuck (Johnny): She's the size of a building, right?

Monster Kate: I do better in the forest. I'm quite easy to spot in the open, if you can imagine that.

Johnny: OK. Well, then let me just say this, you know, I understand your situation, but if you could follow that gentleman in as covert a manner as possible, let's see if we can figure out where that fellow is headed.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, I'll roll Kate's STEALTH. 33 over 30. Yeah, it's really close, but she can't spend LUCK.

Chuck (Johnny): Oh. Oh well.

cuppycup (Keeper): Are you going to follow him anyway?

Chuck (Johnny): Yeah, we're following him.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. Kate begins walking toward this man, but she spots another horse tied up over at the Fulton Place Hotel.

Monster Kate: Do we have time for one more? Just a nibble, Johnny.

cuppycup (Keeper): You'll know that she's talking about Jeremiah's horse, Mr. Wriggles.

Monster Kate: Oh, it looks so alone. Where is its owner anyway? I'd be doing it a favor. It will just starve.

Johnny: You know, I... 

Wes (Jeremiah): *as Jeremiah's spirit* Take care of my horse.

Johnny: I understand the situation, Kate. But that particular horse has something of a sentimental value. If we could skip by that one, I would appreciate it.

Monster Kate: Bollocks. Ok, fine.

Johnny: I'll tell you what, we catch up to that fella, you might be able to snack on him. No promises yet. We got to figure out where exactly his loyalties lie.

cuppycup (Keeper): But now Kate is going to start doing her version of STEALTH. It's adorable what she's doing, like dressage for a Dark Young, but it's not sneaky.

Alex (Ellie): Sneaky thumpin' is what we're going to call it. 

Wes (Jeremiah): *exasperated* Chuck...

cuppycup (Keeper): The man must feel Kate's presence. As you get closer, he slowly turns around to look. You'll recognize him as the shopkeeper of the store. He drops his torch. He's frozen in fear.

Johnny: Kate, could you do me a favor and grab that fellow? I want to have a little chat with him.

Monster Kate: I can do that for you, my little thorn.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, it looks like the shopkeeper was in a hurry, but he's standing there motionless, and Kate can easily sweep him up into a tentacle, and she'll raise him up into the air just below your eye level, Johnny.

Monster Kate: And here you are.

Chuck (Johnny): Do I remember this guy's name?

cuppycup (Keeper): We never remember his name. I think it started with E.

Johnny: Hey there, friend. You remember me.

cuppycup (Keeper): His mouth is hanging open. He's trying to put words together.

Chuck (Johnny): I would assume.

Shopkeeper: *stammering* Oh, I, I sent your letter.

Johnny: You did send the letter? You promise?

Shopkeeper: Yes! I swear I did. Please, please let me go.

Johnny: Alright. Now here's the deal. My friend here, she's got a powerful hunger. You understand.

cuppycup (Keeper): He's sweating profusely, shaking uncontrollably as Kate squeezes him even more tightly.

Johnny: Now, it might be, as I can, and I cannot promise this, I mean that sincerely, I might be I can talk her out of making you into a little bit of a cowboy luncheon, if you know what I mean. But I'm going to need you to shoot me straight. I need you to tell me where Colin Brock is right now.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, give me INTIMIDATE with 2 BONUS DICE, since Kate is assisting you in a big way.

Chuck (Johnny): OK, well, we're going to need the BONUS DIE there and we're going to need the other one. That'll do it. That's a SUCCESS.

cuppycup (Keeper): You can sense that he's reluctant to tell you, but he's also in a very tough spot. I'd say he points off toward the mountains.

Chuck (Johnny): Sure.

cuppycup (Keeper):  I'm running late. I heard someone broke into my shop. And they're in the mines, everyone's in the mines. Enter through the tunnel, across from the mansion. You'll find Colin Brock there.

Chuck (Johnny): What is the way I can dispose of...I don't want to kill this guy, but I don't want him running to the mine and warning others, although I don't think that he'll outrun us. So I'd like to maybe tie him up, you know, hands and feet and deposit him, say, on the roof of a building or something really inconvenient for him.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, you can do whatever you'd like, but it's going to add time.

Chuck (Johnny): Right.

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate, of course, can help you put him on a roof. But if you want to tie him up, you'll need to climb down and do all of that. And if you want the guy to live, give me a POWER roll against Kate.

Chuck (Johnny): Alright. I got a 72, which is a SUCCESS, but only just.

Monster Kate: Did you get what you needed?

Johnny: Yes.

Chuck (Johnny): So I'm leveling with Kate, because I feel like she and I are on the same wavelength and I'm saying,

Johnny: Kate, this guy is probably not a good fella, but he may not be as bad as the others. I don't. I don't want him harassing us on our little journey here, but I don't think he deserves to die unnecessarily.

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate pauses for a moment and the shopkeeper's face, his ears, his whole head turn red and it pops off like a bottle cap as Kate crumbles him up and shoves him into one of her maws. And it feels to you like she swallows him whole.

Monster Kate: I'm trying. I really am. I just got famished. I am sorry for that one. Sometimes I can't help it.

Johnny: This is a journey for both of us, and we are both learning as we go. So, you know what? We'll just chalk that one up to lessons learned. I apologize to Edward or whatever it was that his name was.

Monster Kate: Thank you, my small shrub. We make a good team and I owe you one.

Johnny: Fair enough. Fair enough. But let's just, you know, we'll be even up later.

Monster Kate: To the mountains then.

Johnny: Well, I feel like we ought to probably get a move on right quick. If you understand my meaning,

cuppycup (Keeper): You make your way to the mountains. The night is growing cold and an unseasonal frost is forming on the sun parched foliage high above the peaks. A swirling mass of blackened clouds surround a cluster of stars that flush blood red. And there's an entrance to the mine where the shopkeeper said there would be. But as you approach, the tunnel is partially collapsed.

Chuck (Johnny): I have a concern. Can she fit in the mine?

cuppycup (Keeper): That's a valid concern. Kate is going to be too large to fit through the mine tunnels. At best, this would be an incredibly tight squeeze. Another concern is that as you approach the mine entrance, you're going to see that it's filled with rubble.

Monster Kate: Oh, this is going to take some time, if you'd like me to burrow through.

Johnny: You know, I think that's probably our only option here. I am not, as you can see, a strongman. I don't think that I can clear this tunnel myself.

Monster Kate: Let's come up with a signal for when you have difficulty breathing.

Johnny: I'm sorry?

Monster Kate: I don't want you to get hurt. We'll be tunneling through tons of dirt and rocks, and I can't see you up there. I suppose I could hold you in my mouth.

Johnny: No, and I appreciate your concern. What do you say we go with the old shave and a haircut. 

Chuck (Johnny): And I knock on her hide.

Monster Kate: *laughs* OK. I was going to suggest the same thing,

cuppycup (Keeper): And Kate will tear away the wooden posts, framing the entrance and then begin using her tentacles to clear rubble. She's starting to dig through all of this heavy, loose dirt. And of course, she's good at this; she digs herself into the ground all the time. But she is slow. Let me see If she needs to roll for STRENGTH.

Chuck (Johnny): Mm hmm.

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh God, No. STRENGTH won't be an issue.

Chuck (Johnny): I would hope. I mean, Father Flint was like a 70.

cuppycup (Keeper): She tears at the ground with long tentacles that work their way into the rubble like roots, and she pulls free the fallen stone. The tunnel looks unstable as the debris is being cleared, but she creates just enough headroom for you, Johnny. Kate is grunting and struggling. This is long, difficult work, even for her.

Monster Kate: Oh, we're doing well, my little but. It shouldn't be much longer.

cuppycup (Keeper): Now Kate is looking for an end to the tunnel. Chuck, give me a NAVIGATE roll for Johnny, see if you can help her at all.

Chuck (Johnny): It's a 27, my navigate is 50. Oh, cool. That's a SUCCESS.

cuppycup (Keeper): Do you want to spend 2 points of LUCK for a HARD SUCCESS? You'll get there a little faster.

Chuck (Johnny): Hmm, I think I'm going to save it. A SUCCESS is not a NOT SUCCESS.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, sure. Save your LUCK. Kate continues to burrow through the caved in mind, and you begin to hear muffled chanting, then pinpoints of light and a broth of sickening smells enter the tunnel. Kate bursts through into a large circular chamber. The room is filled with feverish chanting townsfolk and at their center, standing atop an altar, is a man in red robes. His body is contorting like he's being pulled by nonexistent ropes. You'll recognize him from the mansion courtyard: this is Colin Brock. 

But let's revisit Ellie, who was standing in an unusual desert with a stranger facing Brock. And he's moving his hand near his right hip as he's muttering to himself.

Brock: Are you sure you want to do this Ellie? You saw how this worked out for Lance.

The Stranger: Hmm. Who is this Lance? Does he consort with the gods as well?

cuppycup (Keeper): And Ellie, you're dressed like the sheriff again, your badge glinting in the unseen sun. You know you can outdraw this man. This is what you've spent most of your adult life chasing, this moment.

Alex (Ellie): I guess I'm going to try to kill him.

Chuck (Johnny): Fuck yeah.

The Stranger: Don't worry, child. I'll make sure he plays fair.

Ellie: You're a small man on a power trip, Colin, and this is over.

Brock: I admire your moxie. You've got more courage than your father ever did. Maybe we can strike a deal.

Ellie: No, I don't think so. We deal in lead, friend.

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh, nice. Brock nods, then stands silent across this mesa. Suddenly, he reaches for his gun, Ellie, he peels it out of the holster and his .45 Flies up to the level of your chest.

Alex (Ellie): Can I draw?

cuppycup (Keeper): Yes, almost instinctively at the first twitch from Brock, you rip your pistol from your hip and fire your gun at the same time as Brock. But the guns make no sound, and the bullets are like silent beams of dust and light exploding from the barrels. Alex, this is a little different from a conventional duel, and I think we'll let this play out as a best of three OPPOSED POWER rolls, if that sounds good to you,

Alex (Ellie): Yeah, I'm OK with that.

cuppycup (Keeper): Ok, give me your first roll.

Alex (Ellie): 46.

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh my God, I rolled 82 and Colin's power is 80. You're at 50, so you've barely succeeded. You won the first round straight up against him.

Alex (Ellie): Sweet.

cuppycup (Keeper): You see this yellow cloud swirling around Colin, and he throws down his pistol and grasps his stomach like he's in pain. He looks up at you, Ellie, surprised, and his lips continue to move.

The Stranger: Your friend appears a little uneasy. Perhaps next time you call upon me, make it for something a little more challenging.

Ellie: He's not done yet.

cuppycup (Keeper): And you're right about that, of course.

Brock: Nice shot, Ellie. I like you, I think you're ripe with potential. What do you say we end this? Get back to Olvio. Talk it through.

The Stranger: That's what I'd say if I were losing this badly. Not that I would lose this badly.

Ellie: We'll end this, Colin, I can promise you that.

cuppycup (Keeper): Brock grimaces at that and moves his left hand toward a second gun. Ellie, you have one on your hip, too, loaded and ready.

Alex (Ellie): I'll fire on him again.

cuppycup (Keeper): Let's have another round of POWER rolls.

Alex (Ellie): I got a 23 this time.

Chuck (Johnny): Hell yeah. 

cuppycup (Keeper): It was a good roll, but I've tied you with a HARD SUCCESS. 33. Wow. Since Brock has the better POWER number, he's going to win this round, even though you outrolle him.

Wes (Jeremiah): Fuck you.

Alex (Ellie): Are you serious?

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh yeah, it's tough.

Alex (Ellie): That's bullshit.

cuppycup (Keeper): But with that, as this silent blast from his gun strikes you in the chest, Ellie, you feel like something is trying to rip you inside out. At the same time, the sensation of drowning intensifies. Your vision is failing. Your eyes are starting to cloud with blood.

The Stranger: Oh ho! Apparently we underestimated him. Ellie. I'm not really sure you can win this on your own, and it's such a pity after you started with such promise.

Ellie: Help me beat him then.

The Stranger: As charming and persuasive as you are, child, I am not altruistic by nature. I think I want something out of this. That's only fair, isn't it?

cuppycup (Keeper): And he pauses to think for a moment. Meanwhile, Brock throws his gun to the ground and seems to be reaching out toward you now with his bare hands.

The Stranger: Agree to serve my will, Ellie, and I will spare you on behalf of the outer gods. The great ones are selfish and will surely frown upon this little reprieve I offer you, but I do like you.

Chuck (Johnny): Standard offer. *laughs*

cuppycup (Keeper): Alex, mechanically, this would give you 2 BONUS DICE on this last attempt.

Alex (Ellie): Yeah, but then I'm, like, beholden to this scary gray man.

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, it's not an easy decision, but it could be good for you, just in a different way.

Alex (Ellie): I can't trust you.

Chuck (Johnny): The true mark of somebody playing a tabletop role-playing game is telling the game master, Well, I can't trust you.

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh me! I thought you were talking about the stranger.

Wes (Jeremiah):  You would.

Alex (Ellie): I liked it better when I thought I was a god.

cuppycup (Keeper): As you consider this offer, Ellie, a flash of lightning seems to tear the sky apart, illuminating the floor beneath the mesa on the desert sand. There you see writhing creatures crawling their way up to the edges of the mesa and faintly, you hear them clattering, almost cheering you on.

Narrator (cuppycup): *dissonant whispers of "we believe in you, Ellie"*

Alex (Ellie): Oh, God. This is really hard. OK. Alright, alright, alright. Alright. I guess I'll succumb to the will of this guy.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, well, that makes it sound bad.

Alex (Ellie): *laughs* Let's just make it fun.

cuppycup (Keeper): It would be a shame to fail with 2 BONUS DICE now.

Chuck (Johnny): Thanks for reminding her of that.

Alex (Ellie): Help me beat him, and I'll do what you ask.

The Stranger: Ah, so you do agree to my deal. I'm not accustomed to this quaint form of dispute, but I'll see what I can do.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, Alex, let's have one more OPPOSED POWER roll. I rolled 45, which is a REGULAR SUCCESS. You have a good shot.

Alex (Ellie): Alright. Hey, I got 45 as well.

cuppycup (Keeper): Ok, so we both have REGULAR SUCCESSES. That's not enough. But roll the 10s die again. For your first bonus, you're going to need 0, 10 or 20 to win.

Alex (Ellie): It's 30.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. You didn't improve on the REGULAR SUCCESS, and I'm afraid you don't have 10 luck. Give me a really good roll here.

Alex (Ellie): It's 30 again.

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh God. OK. That's a tough one.

Alex (Ellie): Is that really it?

cuppycup (Keeper): Ellie, as Colin is reaching out toward you, you can feel tentacles slithering around your arms. These must belong to the stranger at your side, and those tentacles shoot across the sand, kicking up clouds of dust. Then they begin to wrap around Brock. One of the tentacles slinks around his neck and begins to push through his lips. You're sure this is going to kill him. But at the last moment, Brock clasps his hands around the tentacles and they disintegrate to an ashy mucus.

The Stranger: Oh, he's good.

cuppycup (Keeper): Brock cracks his neck and looks up to lock eyes with you, Ellie. He slowly raises his left hand toward the swirling gray sky, and you feel a pounding sensation in your chest. It's intense, and it feels like your insides are trying to break through your body. Something is boring into your chest, Ellie. As Brock's eyes glow like black fire... 

Brock: Hushabye, Ellie. 

cuppycup (Keeper): He's 30 yards away, but it feels like his hand is inside your chest. Brock is squeezing your heart and you fall to your knees, clutching your chest before flopping lifelessly to the gray sand.

Alex (Ellie): That really took a turn. Well, cool.

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, that was hard.

Alex (Ellie): I was so close!

cuppycup (Keeper): The stranger kneels down beside Ellie, wiping flecks of sand from her cheek with a cold finger.

The Stranger: Ellie Bishop, I charge you to serve my will.

Alex (Ellie): Son of a bitch.

Wes (Jeremiah): You fucker. 

Chuck (Johnny): You prick.

cuppycup (Keeper): Let's return to Johnny, who has entered the ceremonial chamber with Paws and Kate. The cultists seem bewitched, they don't even flinch. They're standing here motionless, focusing on something unseen. They don't even acknowledge Kate as she pushes in with you on her back, Johnny, and Paws is curled up in a tentacle. Colin Brock's eyes are rolled back in his head, and you can see his skin shrivels before you. He pulls back his hands, then strikes them forward like a snake. Blood leaks from the space between his clawed fingers. He smiles, then pulls forth a heart like a magic trick, cupping the heart in both hands. Brock begins to eat. Johnny, you are all standing in this new opening Kate made in the chamber, watching this man revel in this heart

Chuck (Johnny): And Johnny is going to yell out,

Johnny: Colin Brock! 

cuppycup (Keeper): Even though he didn't notice your group as you emerged, he is noticing you now. His eyes have returned to normal or something resembling normal. You're getting his attention.

Brock: Excuse me, this is a private affair. And if you're here for Ellie Bishop, I'm afraid you are a breath too late.

cuppycup (Keeper): Brock holds out a half-eaten heart like he's offering you a bite. Then he steps down from the altar and places the heart onto the lid into some kind of bowl or carving, and with his left hand, he raises a thick, curved blade over the altar and strikes it down into that heart, severing it in a spray of blood. The cultists are transfixed. They groan and wail and begin chanting once more.

Narrator (cuppycup): *cultists chant*

Chuck (Johnny): And I'm going to say,

Johnny: Kate, we got a mighty tasty morsel right there.

Monster Kate: Oh yeah. Can I have all of them?

Johnny: Yeah. But let's start with that one.

Chuck (Johnny): And I'm going to point at Brock.

Johnny: You get that one, it's all you can eat, baby.

Monster Kate: Oh, the old bugger. Scrawny, but I need to start somewhere.

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate carves through the cultists; she's making her way through the cavern toward Brock, knocking over a brazier that spills angry orange coals and charred chunks of sacrifices. You see burnt remains resembling something vaguely feline. The pillars, carved with unsightly markings, seem to writhe as the opening to the sky fills with black mist, and that begins to cascade down into the chamber. Kate tramples everyone in your path as she cuts a line to Colin Brock. He stares at the Dark Young, trying to gather his will, his hollowed black eyes reflecting an endless void rather than the soul of a man. His depleted strength is obvious to you, his sallow withered skin. He's decomposing in front of you.

Brock: You might kill me, but it won't matter. The work is done. The gate is opening. *chants* You and Kate will both notice an energy. It's concentrating into a crystal that Brock wears around his neck and his hands seem to illuminate under the stars. Kate is going to respond and begin vocalizing something you haven't heard from her before. And as she does this, you see Brock's skin begin to harden like petrified wood. Chuck, this might be more fun if you roll for Kate. Brock and Kate are attempting to use magic against each other.

Chuck (Johnny): Yeah, that's fun. Oh wait, let me get the good dice out for this one. I rolled a 71.

cuppycup (Keeper): Ok, that's a PASS for Kate. She's at 80 POW.

Chuck (Johnny): That's true.

cuppycup (Keeper): I rolled a fucking 100. Oh my god.

Chuck (Johnny): *laughs* You FUMBLED the POWER roll of the big bad showdown.

cuppycup (Keeper): Oh, that might be my most fun 100 ever. Brock is feebly trying to cast whatever spell he's directing at Kate, but the energy keeps sputtering out in his hands, and you can see his necklace dimming, then brightening, over and over. And he's shriveling and shriveling until he's hardly a clothed skeleton standing before you blabbering, chanting.  

Brock: *chants*

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate is going to whip one of those tentacles out toward Brock and wrap him up. She winds him into the tentacle like a spool and brings him up so that he's level with you, Johnny.

Brock: Kill me if you want. I told you, you're too late, you're already dead.

Johnny: Fact of the matter is, Colin, you ain't never done any harm to me. Maybe I ought to let you go. But then my boy here, Paws, I think he's got a score to settle.

Chuck (Johnny): Where is Paws?

cuppycup (Keeper): Paws is right along with you, and he's being carried by Kate on one of the back tentacles. He's away from the scuffle here, growling at any surviving cultists behind you.

Chuck (Johnny): Yeah. And hopefully Kate maybe lowers Colin a little closer to Paws.

cuppycup (Keeper): As you're saying this, Kate picks up on it, and she's slowly raising Paws up to her back, just behind you, Johnny. He's growling at Brock now.

Chuck (Johnny): That's perfect. And then I'm just going to say,

Johnny: Get him, boy.

cuppycup (Keeper): Paws leaps at Colin Brock and rips out a chunk of his throat. Hot blood spurts all over you, Johnny, as Brock's head tilts backward, opening his neck and he's oozing this reddish black ichor everywhere as he chokes on his own blood.

Wes (Jeremiah): Oh wow.

cuppycup (Keeper): He takes Brock's face and violently shakes his cheek until he rips off half of Colin's face.

Chuck (Johnny): Yeah, he does that little dog shake.

cuppycup (Keeper): Brock is lying there. Limp as Paws backs off by a couple of steps. The crowd continues to chant.

Narrator (cuppycup): *crowd chants*

cuppycup (Keeper): Then somehow, in a last effort, like he's channeling their strength, Brock's head snaps back into place and he attempts to lunge at you with his arms outstretched.

Brock: *growls* Die! 

Chuck (Johnny): Quick as a flash, Johnny's going to pull out that letter opener out of his boot, and he's going to stab him right in the heart.

cuppycup (Keeper): And when you do that, this is a magic item. Colin Brock's body disintegrates to dust. The letter opener falls to the ground and the black mist continues to swirl.

Johnny: Alright, beautiful. Why don't you go ahead and have yourself a snack? Ding, ding, chow time, baby.

Monster Kate: Come on you, Nobbs.

cuppycup (Keeper): As Kate picks through this crowd, pulling cultist limb from limb, shoving them into each of her eight giant maws, the survivors continue to chant.

Narrator (cuppycup): *cultists chant*

cuppycup (Keeper): And as they chant, the black mist from above continues to fill the room, Kate is making quick work of these people, but something is happening. Something has been set in motion.

Narrator (cuppycup): *cultists chant*

cuppycup (Keeper): In this rapid fire massacre, as Kate is cracking one of the bodies in half, you're going to notice movement in the mist. You see flashes of sharp fangs and long claws. Something is prowling, looking at you with yellow eyes, and you might think you make out four of these things. Maybe five. They seem to be closing in on you.

Chuck (Johnny): OK.

Monster Kate: What are these things, my sprout?

Johnny: Well Kate, I was going to ask you the same question. I take that to mean you don't know either.

Monster Kate: I'm afraid I haven't seen these before. I wonder if Mother would know.

cuppycup (Keeper): And now the altar is shaking. It's rumbling within this distinct cloud of mist. It looks like something is pushing against the lid from the inside.

Johnny: Kate, I got a question for you. I realize this is not an opportune time for a dialog.

cuppycup (Keeper): There's always time for dialog.

Johnny: Yeah. Well, is your momma home? You know, seems like maybe we may be out...you are a fantastic beast, if I may say...I feel like we may be out of our depth.

Monster Kate: Oh, are you sure you want to do that? You're ready to meet Mother?

cuppycup (Keeper): It feels like Kate is a bit reluctant to call her Mother.

Chuck (Johnny): That would make sense.

cuppycup (Keeper): She is bound to you, though.

Alex (Ellie): OK.

cuppycup (Keeper): Chuck, do you want to do this?

Chuck (Johnny): Yeah, I'll say,

Johnny: Kate. Reckon we might see if momma's home.

Monster Kate: Yes. Let me try that.

cuppycup (Keeper): This won't occur in English to Johnny, but Kate will attempt to summon the Dark Mother. Give me a POWER roll on behalf of Kate.

Chuck (Johnny): Sure. OK. I rolled a 65.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. 

Monster Kate: *chants*

cuppycup (Keeper): Kate screams and draws shapes in the Earth with several tentacles, like a child with a stick. The patterns, however, are hard to hold in your mind. They seem to grow by themselves. The symbols are bleeding together, bursts of air create pockets and the encroaching mist. Kate completes the calling with a chittering of her many maws. It is a very odd to Johnny.

Chuck (Johnny): Because the rest of this is not odd. I'm riding a tentacle monster fighting smoke demons.

Wes (Jeremiah): It's pretty normal shit.

cuppycup (Keeper): Beyond the dark clouds, the rumbling thunder is silenced. As the call is answered, a resonating crack thunders open reality and the rolling clouds coalesce the air, hardening into a portal. And from it, a god spills forth. Legions of seeking roots grow from a yawning maw in bursts and starts, pausing on gnarled joints before shooting off in another direction. The sky is blotted out as Olvido is invaded. Earth is shaken loose in the chamber as these strange roots punch deep into the world. They erupt from the walls and climb in from the opening above, the mist ebbs and twists as the creatures within are lanced to the floor and fed upon as they die. The air in the chamber clears without the mist. It's obvious to Johnny that these are more tentacle than root along their lengths. Clusters of polyps open, revealing eyes and searching mouths they open and close in an almost sensual way. It may be lost on Johnny that this is sensual.

Chuck (Johnny): You were doing so well.

cuppycup (Keeper): Some of the tentacles bloat and distend, ending in hooves as if ripening into new nightmares.

Chuck (Johnny): Johnny real quick glances at those and then glances down to look at Paws' hooves.

cuppycup (Keeper): Sort of like that, yeah. Slime sloths off the network of tentacles splashing to the floor, like diseased rain eating into the earth. Where it touches the dead bones grow, bursting from flesh into glistening canopies, budding with fresh veins. One of the appendages crushes the altar and from it, a malformed figure crawls and reaches out toward you with shiny tendrils, Johnny. But the whipping tentacles of a true, uncaring god above smear this creature over the walls.

Monster Kate: I hope you're ready. Hang on tight.

Alex (Ellie): I can honestly say I am as ready as I will ever be.

cuppycup (Keeper): Lifted in a cradle of new growth, Kate and Paws ascend from the ritual site into a frigid night air up toward the cyclopean twisted source of the intruding outer God and its forest of undulating stems. Johnny can see only a mere fraction of its form, the detail lost to distance and darkness. Give me a SANITY roll for Johnny.

Chuck (Johnny): *laughs* No. Alright. Here's to hoping. That was a 40 on my 32 remaining SANITY.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK. This is going to be interesting. Give me a d100.

Chuck (Johnny): OK. For what? What am I rolling? Oh, my SANITY loss is a d100.

Wes (Jeremiah): Jesus, fuck.

cuppycup (Keeper): It's a d100, yeah. She's a big deal.

Chuck (Johnny): Come on, baby. Come on, baby. That's a 14.

cuppycup (Keeper): OK, so incredibly, you are not PERMANENTLY INSANE.

Wes (Jeremiah): Amazing. That's amazing.

Alex (Ellie): I am certainly TEMPORARILY INSANE. That is way more than 1/5 of my SANITY in the day.

cuppycup (Keeper): But still, you had 2/3 chance of going to 0.

Chuck (Johnny): Oh yeah, for sure.

cuppycup (Keeper): You are in BOUT OF MADNESS. You've made it this far, Chuck. I'm going to let you help decide what this looks like for Johnny.

Chuck (Johnny): Sure.

Monster Kate: Isn't she beautiful?

Johnny: Kate, she's...she's glorious. I think I understand now just how much we really are cattle.

Monster Kate: That's ambitious. To her, you're less than a fly on a cow's backside.

Johnny: Yeah, I'm nothing. I'm a gnat.

Monster Kate: Do you want to become part of her?

Johnny: I think that there's something pretty great and way beyond me here. And part of me wants to be a part of this.

Monster Kate: OK, good.

Johnny: But I got some unfinished business back home. You think you could ask your Mama if we could go on one last ride?

Monster Kate: I don't think Mother cares what we do. I know she doesn't care what you do. Some parents are like that.

Johnny: That, you know, that makes sense to me.

Monster Kate: You want to stay here then?

Johnny: Yeah, I think I do.

Monster Kate: And I'll stay with you for sure.

cuppycup (Keeper): And Kate is going to communicate with her Mother in the way that they do. The grasping tentacles are wrenched away, and the three of you are dropped to the desert on the other side of that ravine.

Johnny: Well, good, that saves me the trouble.

cuppycup (Keeper): Grass and vines sprout up around you as the roots withdraw back into the black sky. Thankfully, the world is still again and you are sitting on top of Kate. Paws is curled up with his chin on your lap, Johnny. Your leg is sinking into Kate's hide again, but in your BOUT OF MADNESS, this is a comfort.

Chuck (Johnny): Oh, nice.

cuppycup (Keeper): The endless forest of alien-like trunks that cover Olvido rip free from the Earth like spears pulled from a wounded animal. They recede back into the portal, leaving all that it touched in desolation. Olvido is no more than ash and dust; its remnants fall like a new snow turning you and the discernible landscape gray. And a pinkish orange sunrise begins to break the horizon in front of you.

Chuck (Johnny): And then Johnny is going to make sure Paws is still hanging out on Kate's back. And he's going to settle back down, sitting between those two tentacles where he's sort of figured out his riding style there. He's going to say,

Johnny: Kate, let me ask you a question.

Monster Kate: Sure. Anything.

Johnny: You ever been to Las Cruces?

cuppycup (Keeper): Before he bound the Dark Young, Johnny rode past the remains of the barn where you all found Bertie. Originally, he discovered a burned-out frame, heaps of ash and a corpse among the debris.

Johnny: I'm going to assume you was one of the bad people, so fuck you.

cuppycup (Keeper): Once Johnny and Sinead are clear of the barn, a woman with her face wrapped in scarves steps forward. She unrolls a blanket to cover a clearing in the rubble. She has a baby secured to her chest. This is Ida. And she sets little Bertie down on the blanket, then grabs a shovel that survived the fire. Chuck, you're looking at me funny. Can a shovel survive a fire?

Chuck (Johnny): No, but also I'm angry at you for whatever you're about to say.

cuppycup (Keeper): Yeah, the handle is very brittle, but she's doing her best. And Ida starts to dig and dig and dig until she's satisfied with her work. She lifts Bertie from the blanket and cradles her tenderly.

Ida: Probably best if you just forget them now. You're better off on your own. People like that got nothing to offer you. They just try to live through you anyway, soaking up everything you could ever be until you're old and dried out like them. And that ain't no way to live.

cuppycup (Keeper): Then she sets her down inside the hole that she just dug.

Ida: If my mama taught me anything, it's that children grow into wondrous things, if you plant them deep enough.

Alex (Ellie): Oh my God.

Wes (Jeremiah): Go to therapy.

cuppycup (Keeper): Thank you for listening to Y'all of Cthulhu all the way through. I can't believe it's over. You will want to stick around for the full credits, as we do have some story treats for you. First, I want to thank the cast of Y'all of Cthulhu, beginning with Alex McDaniel, who didn't receive a proper character death send off, thank you. Alex stepped into this game with very little information about what we were doing, except that it was going to be about 8 episodes. So I'm very happy with Ellie's arc and the way everything developed around her as a central character. So thank you, Alex, for playing Ellie. Thank you for a fantastic season.

Alex (Ellie): Hey, y'all, this is Alex McDaniel, a.k.a Ellie Bishop. Thank you so much for listening and joining us on this incredibly long but incredibly rewarding journey, even though I died. See you all next season.

cuppycup (Keeper): Next is Chuck, our sole survivor, playing Johnny Rhodes. Chuck told me no one survives Call of Cthulhu. So here we are. Thank you, Chuck, for creating a lot of the action and moving the story in interesting directions whenever it needed a push. Johnny didn't originally have a huge tie-in to the big story, so to speak, so to be literally indispensable by the end was really cool, and Chuck is also very funny.

Chuck (Johnny): Hey everybody, this is Chuck. I just wanted to thank all of you for listening. This started off as just sort of a fun, weird thing to do, and it turned out to be a really creative outlet and an escape during a pandemic, and a new family in a sense, and a new online community. That is really cool. And that's all because of you all. And I just wanted to say truly, genuinely, thank you for listening.

cuppycup (Keeper): Wes Davis, as I mentioned last time, he's an incredible creative talent, comedian, and he added much of the needed comic relief to what was ultimately a horror show. Wes also assembled his own crew, and we recorded that special prequel arc for his character over on Patreon. Thank you for everything you've done, Wes.

Wes (Jeremiah): Oh hey, didn't see you there. Wes Davis from Ain't Slayed Nobody here. I play Jeremiah. I wanted to say thank you guys so much for listening to the show. cuppycup works his ass off behind the scenes, just really delivers on mic, but y'all have no idea the work he puts in week to week. So send him a note and say thank you and keep his spirits high for season 2. And thanks to Will, our Deputy Keeper, for rocking it behind the scenes and helping us all kind of get into this more deeply. We're really looking forward to season 2, and I want to say thanks to Chuck, Alex, Jay and Brandon for being such great teammates in this. It was really fun to watch everybody's character develop throughout the throughout the show, and I hope you all enjoyed listening to it as much as we enjoyed playing it. And we'll see you in season 2, where I don't know if there'll be as much femur mist, but it'llsomething new and it'll be a lot of fun. *Jeremiah voice* We'll see you next time. And remember, you have a body.

cuppycup (Keeper): Brandon Wainerdi is again someone who trusted what I wanted to do with very little information provided up front. And Brandon grew Father Flint into a memorable character, it was kind of a nice mix of fun and hot and terrifying moments. So thank you, Brandon.

Brandon (Flint): Hey, everyone, it's Brandon Wainerdi, I played Father Flint this season and I just wanted to take a quick moment to shout out a few people. First of all, the incredible cast that I was a part of, all of these people that were recurring cast members were people I looked up to or people I admired from afar for so long and just the fact that I got to spend all this time and and now I consider them friends and get to text them every day is a real honor. I also want to thank Will for his hard work and then, of course, cup for everything he has done for the show to make it what it is. If you're listening, you how much work it must take to make what you just heard possible, and you don't even know the half of it, how hard cuppycup works and what he has put into this show. And I'm just so grateful that he asked me to be a part of this journey. And I can't wait for season 2. I'll be wearing probably a lot more shirts and doing a little less drugs, but I can't wait for that journey and thank you all for listening.

cuppycup (Keeper): And of course, Jay Arnold. It feels like Lance died a long time ago. I told him the season was almost over when that happened, but it became obvious when I killed him, or when the dice killed him, let's say that. The fans loved and appreciated Lance. Thank you, Jay, for an ambitious accent above all and a gunslinger trope that we badly needed to pull off the Wild West setting. Thank you, Jay.

Jay (Lance): What's up, everybody? This is Jay Arnold. You know me as Lance on Ain't Slayed. I just wanted to say thank you to all the listeners. You all have really made this a joy, and we hope you all enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed playing. So thanks again for listening.

cuppycup (Keeper): All of the cast brought something different and valuable to the show, and all of them have decided to return for season 2 of Y'all of Cthulhu. We sure do hope you'll join us for that. And I would also like to thank writing contributors, but first, an aside. 

Three men are combing through large piles of rubble. It looks like a mountain has been decimated. Remaining debris is covering a couple of square miles. The men's pressed white shirts are soaked through with sweat. They're sorting through jagged rocks, timber, occasionally human bones. They've left numbered markers on several piles, and they seem to be methodically working through the ruins. The one wearing spectacles scribbles down copious notes.

Young Agent: Agent Johnson, did you ever see anything like this? Whole town's been leveled. 

Johnson: Hell, I ain't even heard of anything like this.

Federal Agent 1: Fellas, I've got something over here.

cuppycup (Keeper): The man bends down in his pinstriped pants and plucks something shiny out of the rock heap.

Young Agent: What the hell's that? Some kind of knife? 

Federal Agent 1: No, not quite, look at this. It's a letter opener.

Federal Agent 2: It's engraved. 

Federal Agent 1: It's just like the ones we've got back at the office.

Federal Agent 1: Well, I'll be damned.

Johnson: Say Professor Bleeker, you think all this is connected to that massacre back in Las Cruces?

cuppycup (Keeper): He's talking to a fourth man leaning against a large wagon. He's wearing a button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and he looks up at the men surprised, like they've interrupted him in deep thought. The wagon he's leaning against looks old with rotting boards and what's left of the badly faded paint on the side of the wagon reads Medicine Show.

Bleeker: Connected. What do you think?

Johnson: I'm just asking because this is all a little strange to us. We don't see things like this back in D.C..

Bleeker: Then pray that you never do. Either way, I'll put together a group of investigators, we'll look into it.

Young Agent: Good luck with that. I wish we could help with the funding, but you know how it is.

Bleeker: I can't say I do.

Johnson: The Las Cruces sheriff, Higgins. He's about the only body that didn't turn up in the search. Maybe we can track him down.

Federal Agent 1: Guys, what the hell is that?

cuppycup (Keeper): There's a rustling as a massive shadow forms above the debris.

Johnson: Mother of God.

cuppycup (Keeper): Suddenly, a beast charges toward the men. They narrowly dive out of the way as this creature runs between them and keeps going.

Federal Agent 2: Is that a giant camel? Damn thing must be 20 feet tall.

Bleeker: Actually, it was only about 10 feet.

cuppycup (Keeper): Let's continue the thank yous with Will Baiser. Will heard that we were creating this RPG podcast and he reached out to me to see how he could be involved. I was originally going to run an original scenario for the first episode and then transition to Shadows over Stillwater. I think that would have been really good, but not nearly as special as doing the custom arc that Will eventually talked me into. It was a pain in the ass, of course, but I think we're better for it, and Will created a big, lore story that drove the plot forward. He invented Mgepgathga and Will made numerous setting elements like towns and NPCs. Will was also involved in a ton of back and forth, especially at the beginning. And of course, he memorably played Professor Wilkinson. So thank you, Will, for everything you've done.

Will (Writer): Hey y'all, it's Will Baiser here, the Deputy Keeper. Thank you all for writing with us for the past two years. I really appreciate y'all enjoying the story and listening through. Big shout out to the cast here and another big shout out to cuppycup, the man himself. Thanks to everyone. We'll see y'all next season.

cuppycup (Keeper): I would also like to thank Graeme Patrick, who I met on Discord a little less than halfway through the first season. Graeme worked with Will to conceive the original Dark Young encounter at the campsite, and ever since that episode, he's been so valuable to the show. Graeme conceived and improved many scenes in the second half of the season, especially in the endgame. Graeme is so well connected to the Cthulhu mythos and the horror genre, and he was exactly what we needed as we amped up the scares and these final episodes. Graeme is joining us to write for season 2, and I'm super excited to have him along from the beginning. Thank you, Graeme.

Graeme (Writer): Hello, there. Thanks for listening to season 1. It's been great fun being involved in the writing and seeing all the mad theories on discord. Big thanks to cup and the cast for letting me be involved, and I hope to see you in season 2.

cuppycup (Keeper): I'd also like to thank Rina Haenze, Scott Dorward and Kat Jenkins for additional writing support whenever I needed advice on improving a scene or making an idea scarier. They were there for me. They've all been nagged by me at various points throughout the season, and all of them have made major contributions to Ain't Slayed Nobody, not just here on Y'all of Cthulhu, but outside of this as well. So thanks to the three of you. And Rina will be joining us in the main cast of Y'all of Cthulhu for season 2, so I'm incredibly excited to add them to our dynamic group of players. We also have a series of Max Hammett Mysteries on the way, featuring Rina. If you don't know who Max Hammett is, you will. Speaking of the season 2 cast, we'll also be welcoming London Carlisle. London is a fantastic Keeper over at Spot Hidden on Twitch, and he'll feature in some other games between seasons, including a Max Hammett game. Welcome to the main cast, Rina and London. Next, I'd like to thank our NPC voice contributors for season 1, but first another vignette.

Higgins: Why the hell did I come out here by myself?

cuppycup (Keeper): The sheriff from Las Cruces, Sheriff Higgins, is working through a cave system by lantern light. He's alone and the lantern light is barely reaching the walls of this cave.

Higgins: Oh, Jesus.

cuppycup (Keeper): He whips around to see where these strange noises are coming from.

Higgins: Hello, anybody there? Hello? A goddamn waterfall? Look at that.

cuppycup (Keeper): And the sheriff steps down behind the waterfall, down a shallow ledge, and he's on the floor next to a massive cave pool. A circle of moonlight is reflecting off of the black water.

Higgins: Hello? Hello? I have a gun. Jesus Christ, Wilkerson, is that you?

Wilkinson: It's Wilkinson.

cuppycup (Keeper): We had so many talented people involved in creating Y'll of Cthulhu, and I'd like to thank our voices. In Sparky's cabin, we met Victoria Hogan as Kate Caldwell and of course, Victoria played Kate in a variety of ways throughout the season, and she's just fantastic. In Mesilla, we met Mella Vanderpool as Dutch, the bartender, and he's such a cool guy. That was a lot of fun. And Leonardo Quar as Lopez, the blacksmith; they were both a lot of fun to work with. I hoped we would be able to bring them back, but it just didn't work out in the way the story developed in Las Cruces. We met some other great character actors: Pepe Urman as Dr. Zamora, Gina Weatherford as Helen, the saloon proprietor, and we met Daisy Hobbs as Ida. And of course, Ida, one of my absolute favorites, became an integral part of the plot. We also met Danny Scott as Jimbo at the saloon and Rina Haenze was there as Mrs. Wilkerson. Wilkinson. Danny and Rina, of course, played multiple roles in the season, and we found them later in Olvido. Now in Olvido, we met Kim Lane as Grace; again, another fun, super cool person to work with. Rina Haenze was back as Isabel Fulton, Melissa Bell played Nina Fulton. Excellent. Danny Scott was Dust Devil and Scott Dorward, of course, played a special role as The Stranger in the Shadow Desert.

We had several artistic contributions for season one, including Everton Lua, who created the cover art for every single episode. Just a fantastic artist. Glowner created the logo for Ain't Slayed Nobody that is ubiquitous now. I put it everywhere that I possibly can. John Sumro, another fantastic artist, created our Dark Young artwork for the patron holiday mailer, and Kat Jenkins created art from two of our scenes, and I'm sure we'll be working together on more stuff soon. Music and sound effects, of course, were vitally important to me in the production of the show, and I just want to thank some of those contributors. Eileen Shannon provided vocals for Old Jeremiah, which I used in two different instances. Graham Plowman became a big part of the end game. He created several custom musical pieces, and it will be back for season 2, I'm certain. Wes Otis: fantastic libraries. Some are specific to the Old West, others are horror. You can find Wes Otis at Plate Mail Games on DriveThruRPG. His stuff's also at Battle Bards, and his work was just perfect for setting kind of undercurrents for scenes and other pieces of music. And Cody Fry for Dead Man Walking, which we used as our theme song. I just love the song and I've heard it a billion times. So even though it wasn't created for the show, it really feels like a a part of who we are.

I would also like to thank other people who have helped with the show, and I do apologize, I'm probably forgetting people, literally hundreds of people helped us make this season what it was. I want to thank Chaosium for this incredible game and all of the support they've provided, and especially Mike Mason, Mob and Brian Holland. Thank you to Paul Fricker. Thanks to Joe Trier and Eoghan from How We Roll, Mike Diamond and Spike from the Old Ways Podcast, Rev from the Crit Show, John Hook, Alex Gattaca, SpiderQueenLong, MiniTitan10, The Mellow Sign, Czernabog, Mary Lou Behrig for coming up with Bertie in our Patreon NPC contest, Daniel, Pengthulhu, Graham Walmsley, our Discord community, which you should join - slayed.me/discord. Come chat with us. The Good Friends of Jackson Elias. The How We Roll Discord. Both of those communities are fantastic. The Call of Cthulhu subreddit. And I really must thank my wife, who wouldn't want to be named. But if she ever does listen, thank you for your endless patience and support for the show. I was working 30 or 40 hour weeks, all on nights and weekends, so it's been incredibly taxing. Thank you to the families of everyone involved for shuffling schedules and everything else that just helped us reach the end of this chapter.

We do have another epilogue coming, but first I want to thank the Patreon Posse, as I was pouring money into countless things that I thought would make Ain't Slayed Nobody better. The patrons were there, always giving me this massive boost. Thanks to y'all, we're going to have new recording equipment for players and a paid cast in season 2. We are also pushing for those biweekly episodes, so please join us at patreon.com/aintslayed to make that possible. I want to thank our top patrons, but I'm going to do it a little differently by looking at lifetime contributions. I can't read all of the names, but I do want to highlight top contributors regardless of whether you're still in the posse. Thank you to Anthony D., Drew M., Matthew S., Call me dirt, Michael D., Ashley, R., TenSoon's Shadow, Sandra W., Kevin M., Pack Hunt CR., Dan F., Ryan M., Angriest Bird God, Kiliusmanjaro, Nathaniel S., Lancey Pants, Will B., Stephen D., Mendacii, Yankee, Dylan M., Jeff F., Mellow, Alex G., Mario S., John S.. Michael H., Aaron B., Nero the Generous, Emily B., Rise Cthulhu, Kaylon, Kelly M., Kevin S., Kyle K., Lewis R. and Sean W. I will now thank the newest members to the posse. Paco777, Chuck, Brolan G., Chris, T., David W., Elara C., Noops, Andrew S., Nathan P., and Jerry. Thank you to our patrons. Every single one of you who is a member or whoever was, and if you'd like to support the show, please join us over at patreon.com/aintslayed. Oh, a special thanks to Hedge, Kaylon, K. Coles, Mr. Spike, Q10 Fanatic, Zephyr Texan, Wyolaskan, Bilgepump, Chaotic Amateurs, Czernobog, and Anthony D. For submitting audio for the cult chant. Join us to chat at slayed.me/discord. Buy T-shirts at slayed.me/merch. Homefield, who makes our T-shirt, is an excellent company. So get in there. And most importantly, please tell people to listen to season 1 of Y'all of Cthulhu. The whole thing's done. They can binge it, they can space it out, whatever they want to do. But it's there. It's done. There's no question about when it's going to complete, so please tell people about the show. If you see people online asking for recommendations or tabletop podcasts, whatever the case may be, I really appreciate it. When I see our name pop up, it makes me feel so good. You really are the ones who can make the show bigger and better, and that's what we're hoping to do. And now finally, our final epilogue scene.

cuppycup (Keeper): Under the undying half light of a desert dream, the hungry eyes of what was once a sheriff stalks a new prey. Trophies of the judged hang on mismatched chains that are entwined in thin straw blond hair, offerings to be delivered to her new God.

The Stranger: Embrace the eternal twilight, Ellie. Walk these desert sands and hunt those that would shun my will and who dare to speak my name without reverence. For I am Nyarlathotep.

Alex (Ellie):  Oh man.

Ellie: Wreathed in a shawl of skins and salvaged clothes, she carries a symbol of her office, a pearl-handled long iron which refuses to miss. The bleak, abandoned town sits tormented against never ending twilight. Its main street feels like a killing ground that has yet to be, memories of people lurking just out of sight beyond dust filled doorways. The innards of the building hold nests of shadows that seem to watch travelers pass by. The specter of the sheriff approaches a building with neglected wooden walls hanging on a weary, weather-worn frame. The planks are bleached silver with time that neither stands still nor moves on and to the structure is slowly being picked apart by wicked thorn bushes growing up and between slack and boards threatening to consume it. Smoke rises from the remnants of a smoldering rooftop, and the Wraith sheriff pauses her patrol. She hears a familiar sound, one that rises above the muted murmurs of the building. Well, this is a barn, isn't it?

cuppycup (Keeper): You are listening to Ain’t Slayed Nobody. For ad-free episodes, heaps of bonus content, and special programming please join our posse at patreon.com/aintslayed or subscribe to Ain’t Slayed Nobody+ at Apple Podcasts. See the show notes for full credits, and help us grow by posting friendly reviews and spreading the word to your friends and followers. Thank you and good luck out there!