Note: Ain't Slayed Nobody is produced for the ear and includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors. FAIRYLAND, EPISODE 3: INTO THE MADNESS cuppycup (Keeper): Ain’t Slayed Nobody is a produced actual play podcast intended for adults and may contain material that some people find disturbing. Please see the episode notes for content warnings and listen with care. ('LAST GOODBYE' BY ERIC KINNEY FT. DANICA DORA PLAYS) ♪ GRIPPIN' AT MY SKIN ♪ THE WALLS OF NIGHT CLOSE IN ♪ AROUND ME ♪ ONE LAST SLEEPLESS NIGHT ♪ UNTIL THE OTHER SIDE ♪ CAN SAVE ME ♪ DRIPPIN' FROM MY EYES ♪ SEEIN' RED TONIGHT ♪ AS I WAIT ♪ TO SAY MY LAST GOODBYE Bill: Mr. Erskine, has your daughter, the lass who hurt Maggie, has she spent time in these fairy woods? Erskine: Perhaps. Perhaps. Ol': Sir, what are you hidin' from us? Because when I said that we don't have a child with us, you were happy. But as soon as I said no, actually I have a niece, things changed. Scott (GM): While you're having this conversation, Maggie has been stirring from under the anesthetic and she's tried pushing herself up off the table and is looking a bit woozy. And then she looks around at the bunch of you and she seems to think that she can stand up and tries putting her feet down on the ground, and then there is this thump as she collapses in an untidy heat down on the ground. Bill: Oh, whoopsie, my bad. Probably should have made sure she was secure. Will (Ol'): I'm still standing by the door and they're obviously watching Maggie. But again, I'm not her mother. Alex (Mary): Ok, OK. I see how it is, Ollie. Mary's going to say, Mary: Maggie! Alex (Mary): And rush over to pick her up and check on her. Scott (GM): And she's saying, Maggie: Mommy, I don't feel very well. Can we go home, mommy? Can we go home? Mary: We'll go home soon, but we need to know what happened. Can you tell me what happened at the school? Maggie: *stammering, afraid* We were playing. Lizzie said that we were going to dance and and she grabbed my hands and she spun me round and something... I want to go home, mommy. Mary: You've got to look at me. You've got to tell me what happened. Finish your story. Scott (GM): She puts one hand up to her shoulder and says, Maggie: Something...something went pop. Bill: Medically speaking, she is correct. Everyone: *laughs* Ol': Mr. Erskin. Tell us what you know. Erskine: I don't know what you want to know. I said daughter is a special girl. Ol': Mr. Erskine, I don't care about your daughter anymore. What's going on here? Erskine: Look, if you're sensible, you pack up your bags, you leave this town. But you shouldn't leave. Oh, I don't know. I don't know any more. I don't know. Bill: I do find myself wondering, Mr. Erskine, this little girl of yours doesn't speak at all to the other children. Left alone for a few moments with my granddaughter, she rips her arm out of the socket. Erskine: I suppose the other children know not to play with her like that. Scott (GM): And this seems like a good point to cut back over to Zeke. Chuck (Zeke): Oh, yeah! cuppycup (Bill): And Bill starts writing up a prescription for Lizzie's aggression. Scott (GM): So Zeke was digging away in the garden, and yeah, the last we saw, he had just uncovered what appeared to be a disturbingly small human pelvis. Chuck (Zeke): Yes. So I'm at 3, which is like not crazy, but not not crazy. So Zeke is actually going to see if he can dig up whatever else is down there, however many bones it may be. Scott (GM): Then, yeah, you spend probably about an hour just digging and piecing this together. And, you know, the body's probably been buried here for a little while, but you do piece it together and it does seem to be the skeleton of a child. But what you find is when you make your way up to the head, the skull has been smashed in. There's just fragments, there are pieces of it all over the place. Is that a good opportunity for an INSIGHT roll? Chuck (Zeke): I guess so, yeah. It's a 2. Scott (GM): OK, so you are oddly OK with this. Chuck (Zeke): Well, I'm strangely comfortable with that. *laughs* Do I know where everyone else went? Scott (GM): Well, I mean, you know that Mary was going off to the school, you believe that Bill was probably going to the doctor's surgery, but may have gone off to Dr. Boswell's House. Chuck (Zeke): I think I'm going to set off to go find someone else from the family. Scott (GM): OK. You sort of traipse your way through town. I mean, you're covered in mud at this stage from having been there on your hands and knees, digging through all this, and probably looking quite ashen; you know, maybe in a slightly dissociative state as you're wandering through the town. Chuck (Zeke): Still carrying a garden hoe. Scott (GM): But, yeah, as you make your way down to the doctor's surgery, I mean, the door is ajar there and you can hear the sound of voices in there; you recognize Ollie and Bill and Mary's voices in there. Chuck (Zeke): Ok, I walk in. And I say, Zeke: Ollie, I need to speak with you, please. Scott (GM): You notice that there is something just poking out of the turnup of his work trousers, something white and sharp just seems to be sticking out. Ol': Everything all right, Zeke? Zeke: If you could come in the hallway here, I would appreciate discussing something with you. Will (Ol'): All right, then I'll head on out. Chuck (Zeke): He comes out and I tell him, Zeke: Ollie, I was looking around the grounds and I did a little bit of digging. And I mean, I found this... Chuck (Zeke): I'm assuming what was in my belt was one of the bone fragments? Scott (GM): When you look in the turnup, yeah, you can see that somehow one of the finger bones just found its way in there. Chuck (Zeke): Oh, I didn't even know it was there. Cool. Zeke: There is the body of a child that I have discovered on our property. Chuck (Zeke): Do I know how long ago? Scott (GM): No. You can give me a d6 roll to try to work this out. Chuck (Zeke): A 4. Scott (GM): From the state of the bones, from the fact they're yellowed and, you know, everything had rotted away and they'd all separated, you reckon that body's been there for quite a long time, certainly years. Ol': Hold on, hold on, Zeke. Will (Ol'): I walk back into the room. Ol': Mr. Erskine, what happened to your daughter? Erskine: What do you mean? Ol': What happened to her? Erskine: She...she's not quite the girl she was. I don't know what to tell you. Ol': Because, sir, I remember you telling me, and this is your words, that the farm, our farm, isn't a great place for children. So... Will (Ol'): He spits some chew out. Chuck (Zeke): That he brought with him from America. cuppycup (Bill): *laughs* From New Mexico. Scott (GM): You're spitting into the same chamber pot that you vomited in a while back? Will (Ol'): Of course. Where else would I spit? cuppycup (Bill): He retrieved the chew from that pot just a minute ago. Scott (GM): *laughs* Oh, God. Ol': Why would I waste good chew? Scott (GM): Oh, God. It's the bathroom scene from Trainspotting all over again. Ol': Sir, these are your words. Why exactly is it dangerous for children there? Erskine: It's...the fairies, the little people in there, they like the children. Ol': Hmm. Zeke, can you come on in here for a second? I'd like you to meet somebody. Chuck (Zeke): And Zeke walks in just looking a total mess. Ol': Mr. Erskine, this is my my brother in law, Zeke. Zeke: Yes, how do you do? Ol': What exactly did you just find? Would you would you care to tell Mr. Erskine for me? Zeke: There's the body of someone buried on our property. I don't know who it was, I was hoping we could maybe discuss this in private, but Mr. Erskine, if you have any thoughts on this... Ol': No, Zeke, Mr. Erskine knows a lot about this town. Erskine: Now, that's terrible. That's terrible. You're saying he found a body? Look, we've got to talk to the police. We got to talk to you...let's find the constable and talk to him this if there's bodies involved...this is terrible. Zeke: Yes, I believe we should get the police involved. Scott (GM): I mean, at this point, Erskine is just walking out of the surgery. Chuck (Zeke): I don't know if this guy from Adam, so I don't know if y'all want to stop him or not. Will (Ol'): I'm standing in the doorway. Scott (GM): Well, unless you're physically stopping him, he's just kind of shuffling past you and going out. Chuck (Zeke): Don't ask Will if he's maybe physically stopping him. Will (Ol'): I'm not. But I wanna say, Ol': Mr. Erskine, I'm gonna ask you again: what happened to your daughter? Erskine: I need to find the constable, I need to find the constable. Scott (GM): And he's just walking out onto the street. Chuck (Zeke): Well, I'm going with him. Scott (GM): OK. Chuck (Zeke): I am interested in finding the constable as well because there's a dead body on our property, and I'm going to react like a person and say I'm going to call the cops. Will (Ol'): Yeah, I'll follow Zeke. I'm very suspicious of Mr. Erskine, just cause everything he's told me, it isn't adding up. cuppycup (Bill): Does Bill overhear enough to connect the name Erskine to the records he saw earlier? Scott (GM): There wasn't too much about Callum Erskine, the father. There was quite a lot of stuff about Moira, about her having some kind of nervous ailment, and he's basically been prescribing her laudanum. Chuck (Zeke): Laudanum? I'm familiar with the stuff. Scott (GM): Yes. cuppycup (Bill): How much of that conversation that just happened is Bill privy to? Scott (GM): Well, I think actually all of it, you know, the doctor's surgery isn't large and I don't think anyone is shutting the door, so you'd be pretty hard pressed not to hear all that. cuppycup (Bill): OK. Bill: Mary, bring Maggie along. We need to chase these boys down. I need to know more about the skeleton Zeke found. Mary: We'll wait here at the surgery. Maggie isn't leaving here yet. She's just starting to come around. Bill: With all that's happening, Mary, I'd feel better if we stick together. The constable's house might be the safest place for all of us right now. Mary: We need to let Maggie rest. Bill: Whatever you do, Mary, whatever you do, don't go back to the house without us. There's something going on here and I don't like it. We need to figure it out before we go back there. Mary: Of course, we'll wait for you here. cuppycup (Bill): And where are the rest of us heading then? Scott (GM): Where Mr. Erskine is leading you to is basically just someone's house. He knocks on the door and says, Erskine: Alec, are ye home? Scott (GM): And after a few seconds, the door opens and there is a middle-aged man, slightly overweight, with thick whiskers, who opens the door and he's sort of dressed in a police uniform and it's not quite done all the way up yet. He opens the door and, Thorburn: Oh, what is it, Callum? Scott (GM): And he looks round in alarm at the rest of you. Thorburn: Has something happened? Zeke: Yes, something something has happened, we have discovered the body of a child on our property, and I need you to come take a look straight away. Scott (GM): By the way, as soon as you're there in the doorway talking to him, give me a roll just to see whether you notice something. Chuck (Zeke): That's a 6. Scott (GM): Oh, dear. OK. Alright. You see, standing in the back, I mean, this is a fairly small house and there's basically just a single room on the ground floor that's got a hearth and a table with a couple of chairs, and you can see that standing behind the constable is a little girl. She's standing there and she's wearing, you know, a fairly tatty, faded-looking dress, and she's standing there just basically staring at the wall. And as the sounds come from outside, she looks around and there's something about the way her neck bends that you really don't like. And as the light catches her eyes, the way that they're reflected in the eyes, it's just wrong. Human eyes don't reflect like that, there's, you know, they almost seem white for a moment. And I think that's a good time for an INSIGHT roll. Chuck (Zeke): Sure. That is a 4. Am I trying to roll above or below my number? Scott (GM): You want to roll below. Chuck (Zeke): So I did not. Scott (GM): So your INSIGHT goes up by one. Chuck (Zeke): Ok, I'm at 4 now. Scott (GM): So basically at this stage, you are coming unraveled. I mean, it's up to you how you play this, but you are not holding your shit together well at all right now. Chuck (Zeke): I actually make an audible noise, kind of an "ahhh!" and take a step backwards out of the door, just reflexively, I'm not trying to be rude, but I am also unnerved by kind of everything. Scott (GM): Well, I think this is a pure reflex and you are not in full control. You not only step back, but there's cobblestones out there, it's an uneven surface, and you just trip over and you fall heavily on the ground. Chuck (Zeke): Yes, that makes sense. Scott (GM): Yeah. Everyone else can hear Zeke just cry out and he's just sitting there, his eyes wide with terror, just panting. Bill: What's wrong, boyo? Ol': Zeke, what the hell is wrong with you? Zeke: *terrified* That..that girl. Did you see that girl? Will (Ol'): Can I look and see the girl? Scott (GM): The constable steps forward at this stage; he's doing up the buttons of his coat and he's stepping out and closing the door behind him and says, Thorburn: Well, if there are problems at the farm, we better get going now. Scott (GM): And the door clicks behind him. Chuck (Zeke): Zeke has also taken a considerably large swig out of his jacket pocket. Some might call it a chug. Bill: What about the girl, Zeke? You're pale as a ghost, lad. Zeke: There was a girl in there, did you see the girl? Bill: I didn't notice a girl. Zeke: She...her eyes. She had the eyes! Ol': Zeke, I have no idea what you're talking about. Chuck (Zeke): I am now sort of scrambling backwards, away from the constable. cuppycup (Bill): And is Erskine still lurking around? Scott (GM): Yeah, Erskine is still looking very uncomfortable with the situation. And, you know, the constable says, Thorburn: Oh, don't mind that, that's Annie. She'll be alright in the house. We need to deal with your situation at the farm, don't we? Let's go and see what you dug up. Bill: Let's go to the farm then. We've just taken up at Linty Farm, I trust you know it. What do you say then, Zeke? Chuck (Zeke): Zeke is caught in a world of not particularly wanting to be with the constable, but definitely not staying at that house, where that girl is. Ol': Mr. Erskine, if you wouldn't mind tagging along, I would appreciate it. Erskine: I don't know what I can do for you at this stage. Look, I have a shop to run. You have the constable with you now, if you need to speak to me later, you know where to find me. Bill: Let the man go, Ollie, so he doesn't have to interact with another NPC. That can be awkward. Everyone: *laughs* Chuck (Zeke): Said the other GM on this call. Bill: I don't feel comfortable leaving Mary and Maggie alone with all that's happening. Scott (GM): Yeah, I mean, actually, that's a good point. Let's cut back to Mary and Maggie back at the surgery. As soon as the others have gone, I mean, Maggie seems a bit revived. She seems to be coming out from under the ether and she's slowly coming back to her own self. But at the same time, she also seems very distracted; she keeps looking around, keeps looking at the corners of the room and into the shadows. And she seems really quite jumpy. Mary: What are you looking at, Maggie? Maggie: Can you hear them? Mary: Hear who? I don't hear anyone. Maggie: I thought I heard them singing. Mary: Who? Maggie: The fairies. Mary: Sweetie, what are you talking about? Who are the fairies? Maggie: The fairies, I heard them! Scott (GM): And again, she looks at the corner behind you and her face just breaks into a big grin. Mary: There's no one there, Maggie. Chuck (Zeke): Did you look? *laughs* Scott (GM): Yeah, you're sure there's nothing there, right? I mean, there can't be anything there. Mary: Okay, I'm going to turn and look. Scott (GM): And yeah, I mean, the corner does seem very dark. And just for a moment, yeah, maybe there's something moving in the shadow there. I mean, it's probably just a mouse. Chuck (Zeke): *whispers* PUSH the roll. Alex (Mary): I was just going to say that! I heard it in my head, right before you said it. "Push the roll". Everyone: *laughs* Alex (Mary): Mary's going to investigate that corner to be sure that it's nothing. Do I need to roll to do that? Scott (GM): Yeah, if you want to. Head up to the corner and take a look. Bill: He sounded skeptical. Alex (Mary): I rolled a 3. Scott (GM): There's something wrong here...there shouldn't really be a shadow here. I mean, it's bigger than it should be and and it seems so much deeper. And yeah, you can see perhaps, I don't know, the glint of something in there. Alex (Mary): I'm going to keep walking toward the corner. Chuck (Zeke): Yeah! Scott (GM): OK, you keep walking towards it and the shadow...I mean, that's not just a corner anymore. I mean you walk into the shadow and you're not quite sure where the shadow stops and then just all of a sudden Maggie gives an excited giggle and runs past you and just runs into the corner and she's, you can see her kind of getting smaller as she's moving away from you into the corner of the room. Mary: *panicked* Maggie, where are you going? Stop! Scott (GM): And she seems to be getting further and further away. It's almost like watching her shrink just into this...the shadow, you know, when you looked at it from across the room, it looked like it was a couple of feet across and now, you know, it's like looking down a telescope towards her, you know, down the wrong end of a telescope. She's getting smaller and smaller, and she's giggling happily. I think this calls for an INSIGHT roll. Alex (Mary): Yikes, I rolled a 5. Scott (GM): OK, so your insight was? Alex (Mary): My insight was 4. Scott (GM): So it's now 5. Chuck (Zeke): Alright! You are almost crazy. Alex (Mary): Cool. Cool, cool, cool. Scott (GM): You are teetering on the edge as you watch your daughter run into this tiny shadow on the corner of the room and start disappearing out of sight. Alex (Mary): I'm going to run after her. Scott (GM): OK. So you're following her. You're running into the darkness, into this tunnel. You can see, there's kind of wooden struts all around you. These, you know, strangely angled bits of wood. And you can see that there are corridors or passageways stretching down in other directions. You know, you catch just a glimpse as if you're looking out of the corner of another room into someone's house and you look down another side and you catch a glimpse of this abandoned house that is just filled with this crazy woodwork. But, yeah, Maggie's just running straight ahead away from you. And if you're keeping up with her, she runs and runs and there's now wood all around you, these sort of crazy angles of planks and boards and not just boards, but, you know, like branches, like some kind of almost nightmarish funnel web just going down. And suddenly it just opens up into this dusty, cobweb-filled rank, malodorous wooden cabin. Maggie just runs straight out into it. And you can see a few things: there's, you know, a pile of rags or something on the ground, a pile of sticks and rags just in one corner. But there's a man sitting on the ground just beside this pile of rags. He seems to be playing, or at least fiddling with what looks like a bowl on the ground, just rocking it backwards and forwards. But as first of all Maggie and then you come through, he looks up at you, across the room in alarm and reaches over and grabs this rusty shotgun off the ground and lifts it up. Iain: What are you doing in here? Scott (GM): And this is a good point, I think, to cut back to the others. cuppycup (Bill): Yeah. Right before she dies, let's just check in. Bill: Why don't we stop by the surgery to pick them up? Scott (GM): So the rest of you, with the police constable in tow, go back to the surgery and there's no one there. Bill: I told them to wait right here. We weren't gone very long. Why would they leave? They don't know this town at all. Where would they go? Will (Ol'): I'm going to look to see if there's any evidence of them leaving. It was dusty, wasn't it? Are there footprints going in? How many footprints are coming out? Scott (GM): Yeah, give me a d6 roll and see how you do. Will (Ol'): That's a 4. Scott (GM): The most recent set of footprints in the dust, both Maggie's and Mary's, just seem to walk up to a corner and then just stop there. Will (Ol'): There was no child-sized footprints leaving the room, they're just going to a corner? Scott (GM): Yep. They seem to go one way. And that's that. Ol': Y'all, they're just there in the corner. It's fine. Chuck (Zeke): I say, Zeke: Where are my wife and daughter? They were just here. Bill: I'm surprised we didn't cross paths with them on our way back here. Ol': No, Bill, they didn't leave. There's no footprints, believe it. Unless she carried her out, they didn't leave. Bill: Listen, Ollie, how is that possible? There's no one here, lad. Chuck (Zeke): I turned to the constable, who I don't actually know. And I say, Zeke: What is going on in this town? Where is my wife and daughter? Scott (GM): He looks at the footprints heading over to the corner. And, yeah, his face looks grave for a moment. And he sighs. Thorburn: I'm not sure what can be done now. Zeke: *anxious* What can be done about what? Bill: What are you on about? Thorburn: I really don't know, sir. I have only seen something like this once before, over at the old Wayne house. Will (Ol'): Is that our house? cuppycup (Bill): No, that's Batman's house. Chuck (Zeke): Stately Wayne Manor. Ol': Well, what did you see? What did you see there, constable? Thorburn: He...he did some very strange things that I don't understand. And he found ways of making corners that weren't corners. Ol': You mean walls? Bill: Does anybody have an intermediate calculus book? Thorburn: I mean, you'd have to see it to understand. But he...I think he spent too long in the woods and he learned secrets that no man should ever know. Zeke: Where are my wife and daughter? Thorburn: *heavy sigh* They could be anywhere, sir. They could be anywhere. Chuck (Zeke): Without another word, Zeke takes off back for the house. Scott (GM): OK, and what's everyone else doing? cuppycup (Bill): Bill's not sure how everyone is jumping to conclusions based on these footprints, so he's going to take one close look at those, the footprints heading into the corner, and then he's going to follow Zeke. Scott (GM): The only way that you get anything out of this is just purely rolling your INSIGHT die just to try to understand what happened. cuppycup (Bill): But I already have an inside of 4. Scott (GM): Yeah, it's up to you. Chuck (Zeke): Do it! cuppycup (Bill): Alright. I can't resist peer pressure and Bill can't resist proving he's right. So Bill's going to walk into that M.C. Escher corner. I rolled a 2. Scott (GM): OK, well, yeah, just for a moment, you look at this corner and you know how sometimes if you look at a three dimensional object like a corner, you know, it suddenly can reverse, you know, you can sort of see what seems to be something something that that is pointing inwards, pointing out outwards. Well, it's sort of like that, except it's moving through another dimension that you can't quite get your head around. And just for a moment, yeah, you can sort of see how, yeah, this isn't a corner. This is a doorway of some kind. But then just, you know, it's gone straight out of your head. You have that moment of near understanding and you do have to make an INSIGHT roll, I'm afraid. cuppycup (Bill): Need another two. And it's a 5! Shit. My INSIGHT was a 4. Scott (GM): Yeah, well, you're a 5 now. cuppycup (Bill): Can I immediately tried to reduce my INSIGHT now that I'm 5, or is that something I should wait to do? Scott (GM): Yeah, I mean, it's up to you. I mean, if there's any evidence you think you can start destroying to cover up the traces of what is driving you mad, you can start any time you want. cuppycup (Bill): I'd like for Bill to pick up the largest surgical implement he can find lying around and just start bashing the corner with it. Scott (GM): Oh, right, yeah. Chuck (Zeke): A large surgical implement? I'm trying to picture what that looks like. cuppycup (Bill): It's an oversized novelty scalpel. Scott (GM): There's probably one of those little hammers you use for testing reflexes. It's going to take you a while. But yeah, you can try. cuppycup (Bill): Yeah, it's like Shawshank Redemption. I'm just playing the long game, chipping away at this corner. Scott (GM): I mean, if you spend a while doing this, you get to make another INSIGHT roll then. And if you roll under your existing INSIGHT, it goes down by 1. cuppycup (Bill): OK. Will (Ol'): I'm just watching Bill here. cuppycup (Bill): Ollie's taking video. Will (Ol'): Is it possible to go home with Zeke or has Zeke already left and then we just been here for like an hour, just watching Bill do this? Scott (GM): Yeah, I think it's just you and the constable watching Bill freak out on the corner. cuppycup (Bill): I did roll a 4, so it's under my number. Scott (GM): Oh, fantastic. Yeah. Then your INSIGHT goes down to four. Ol': Constable, what's your name again, sir? Thorburn: Sorry, I'm PC Thorburn. Ol': Mr Thorburn, have you ever seen anything like what's going on around here? cuppycup (Bill): With that reflex hammer, specifically. Scott (GM): Even though Bill is obviously in a fugue state at the moment, I mean, you know the name Thorburn. I mean, you do recognize that is one of the names that had the pages ripped out from after it in the ledgers. cuppycup (Bill): Oh, Alec Thorburn. Scott (GM): Yeah. cuppycup (Bill): Bill looks up from his hammering momentarily. Bill: Did you say Thorburn? Thorburn: Yes, PC Thorburn. Bill: You spent some time here with Dr. Boswell, you and your family. I saw your name in his records. Thorburn: Everyone in town has. He was the village doctor. Bill: You see, some pages are missing. cuppycup (Bill): I've gone American Southerner. Everyone: *laughs* Scott (GM): I'm picturing you having this calm conversation while still whacking the fuck out of the plaster in this corner. cuppycup (Bill): We decided that once you've gained some sanity back, you've still lost control of your accent permanently. Chuck (Zeke): That's canon. Bill: Mr. Thorburn, there were some pages missing from your file in Boswell's record. What do you know about it? Scott (GM): I think as you are, you know, effectively interrogating him here while, you know, waving this hammer around in a rather mad manner, I'll let you make a roll for this. And this is going to be an opposed roll, so I shall roll against you for this. cuppycup (Bill): OK. Will (Ol'): Roll high, cup. cuppycup (Bill): *heavy sigh* It's a 1. Scott (GM): I rolled a 6. Will (Ol'): Does that mean that your guy goes crazy? Scott (GM): *laughs* He says, Thorburn: You'd have to ask the doctor about that. I don't know. He is the one who keeps the records. Bill: Correction. I am the doctor now. Chuck (Zeke): *laughs* I'm the captain now. Thorburn: I'm sure you are, sir. Scott (GM): He says as he watches you hammer the corner again. Chuck (Zeke): *laughs* "Yes. Yes, of course you are." cuppycup (Bill): The corner's reflexes are fine, if anyone's wondering. Everyone: *laughs* cuppycup (Bill): Since I lost the opposed roll, do I need to just be satisfied by that or can I do the reroll thing? Scott (GM): Yeah, I mean, if you roll your INSIGHT die. cuppycup (Bill): Oh boy. Will (Ol'): Do it. Push it. cuppycup (Bill): I rolled a 6! I wanted a 5, though. Scott (GM): OK, well, yeah, I mean, I can't possibly beat that, then. And I rolled a 2 anyway, which is a bit shit, so. Was it your INSIGHT die that came up to 6 then? cuppycup (Bill): Yes. Scott (GM): So you need to make an INSIGHT roll. cuppycup (Bill): OK, so the 6 isn't bad for me. Scott (GM): Not, you know, not yet, but it's ripe with potential. cuppycup (Bill): OK. Will (Ol'): That's one way to say it, sure. Yeah. cuppycup (Bill): I rolled another 6. Scott (GM): *gleeful* Oh, fantastic. So your INSIGHT is back up to 5 as you are still hammering away at the corner. *laughs* Chuck (Zeke): I love that you, like, sobered up just long enough to ask him one more question and then went right back crazy again. Scott (GM): Yeah. Well, you know, working away at the floorboards, you've made a nice big hole there and PC Thorburn, I mean, he looks very serious for a moment and says, Thorburn: I suppose then Dr. Boswell must have been doing me a kindness, as he's done for so many people here and removed the records for Annie. Ol': Annie? Thorburn: Annie, my daughter. Or, well, what I call my daughter. Ol': Why would he remove the records for your daughter and...was your daughter? These things just aren't making sense, sir. Please spare a kind soul some explanation. Thorburn: It's so hard to explain. I...it's going to sound mad if I tell you, but, uh... Ol': Can't be madder than watching my dad hammer the corner. Scott (GM): *laughs* That is a fair point. Chuck (Zeke): You're right. That might sound crazy. Scott (GM): He says...he looks at you very, very seriously. I mean, he's looking at Ollie, obviously, as Bill is, you know, getting stuck into the corner again. cuppycup (Bill): I'm prying up a floorboard with a tongue depressor. Scott (GM): *laughs* He looks very seriously at Ollie and says, Thorburn: Have you ever heard the stories about changelings? Ol': Are they the same ones about fairies? Thorburn: Yes, sort of. There are old stories, old stories with fairies that they take your children away, they take your babies away and they leave something else in their place, something that's not human. Ol': Something that's not human? What is that? Thorburn: My Annie...they took her 15 years ago, they took her, and what's come back to me is not my Annie. It looks like her, it has her face, it knows some of the things that she did, but it's not my Annie, it's not, and I still look after her and it still looks like her and on a good day, I can tell myself that it is Annie. But it's not. Ol': Bill, we need to get out of here. cuppycup (Bill): Is Bill sane enough to hear that? Scott (GM): Up to you. cuppycup (Bill): OK, do I need to destroy something else to make this work? I was thinking of doing a little damage to the constable, if possible. Scott (GM): *laughs uproariously* Chuck (Zeke): He's the evidence. Scott (GM): So what, are you now going to switch from hammering the corner to hammering the constable? cuppycup (Bill): I just wanted to cut him a little bit, if I could. Scott (GM): Um...OK, that doesn't really qualify as destroying the evidence. I think if you wanted to cover up the horrible things you are hearing here and deny the reality of them, deny them to yourself, you'd really have to kill him. cuppycup (Bill): Oh, OK. Chuck (Zeke): Oh boy. cuppycup (Bill): Would it be adequate for me to destroy the ledgers? Scott (GM): Yeah, you could certainly destroy them, but I think you'd have to destroy all the records, wouldn't you? Chuck (Zeke): Time to set another building on fire! cuppycup (Bill): OK, Bill is going to open up all the ether that he can find and start spreading it around in the records room and then get some sort of open flame going. Maybe there's a matchbook in his coat pocket from the lantern the previous night? Will (Ol'): Can I stop him? cuppycup (Bill): You can try to roll for me to fail. Will (Ol'): I'm watching him try to set fire to a building, and I'm still pretty sane. I'm at 3. This doesn't seem like something I would just let go. Scott (GM): I think not just that, but he is setting fire to a building that you are in, while being watched by a police officer. Will (Ol'): Right, I mean... Chuck (Zeke): That's true. There's a lot of reasons to stop him. cuppycup (Bill): In Bill's defense, he's not really trying to burn down the building. He's just trying to destroy the records, and this seems efficient. Scott (GM): So I'm sort of picturing Bill getting up, and stop me if you want to contradict this, but I'm picturing Bill getting up, sort of dropping the hammer on what's left of the floor and the corner, walking over, picking up a bottle of ether and then, you know, probably very calmly going up to the records office and splashing it round. cuppycup (Bill): That's right. I want to get that ether near anything that looks like paper it. Ol': Does this look normal to me? Scott (GM): No! No, it looks so very far from normal. Will (Ol'): OK. Then I'm going to be like, alright, Ol': Dad, this is time. I think it's time we go. I think it's time we go. Will (Ol'): And I'm pulling him out the door. Bill: We've got to do this, lad. It's the only way to make things right. Ol': No, no, no, we don't. Let's get out of here. Let's put the ether down. Will (Ol'): I'm like, grabbing his arms and... cuppycup (Bill): Can I compete with Ollie to make sure Bill is able to complete this destruction of the evidence? Scott (GM): Yeah, this is an opposed roll, then. So each of you roll a d6. Will (Ol'): I got a 2. cuppycup (Bill): I got a 3. Scott (GM): OK, so you're trying to do this, you're trying to stop him, but he's pushing you back and there's now ether everywhere. The air is so full of it that you're beginning to feel groggy just from the fumes. Ol': Mr. Constable, can you can you can help me out over here? Scott (GM): Yeah. Now, PC Thorburn has seen enough people around here lose their shit that he is just getting out of here. He can see what's happening and he wants no part of this. He is just leaving the surgery and leaving you to it. Ol': Thorburn! Ok, well... Chuck (Zeke): I love the idea of seeing this and being like "Yep, I'm out." Scott (GM): Yeah. It's probably for the best. Will (Ol'): If I can't stop this, I'm basically like, I'm trying my best to stop it, but I guess he's just fighting through me. Scott (GM): Yeah. Will (Ol'): And it's hard to stop a human being from doing what they want, no matter how old or young they are. Scott (GM): Yeah. So he has got ether everywhere and I assume, what, you're going for your matches to set it all off? cuppycup (Bill): Yeah. Hopefully there's not too much ether on Bill's clothing, but he's ready to light it up. Ol': I am diving at him trying to stop this. The matches. cuppycup (Bill): You already lost that roll. Scott (GM): OK, well, you can have one last opposed roll here to see whether you can get the matches off him before all of this goes "boom". cuppycup (Bill): Oh God, I rolled a 1. Will (Ol'): That's a 2. Chuck (Zeke): Can I roll to make Will fail at this? Scott (GM): *laughs* Alex (Mary): If that doesn't work, can I roll too? Because I want him to fail as well. Will (Ol'): Be my guest. Chuck (Zeke): I very much would like Will to fail. Scott (GM): I think that seems fair. Chuck (Zeke): OK. Well, I just rolled a 4. Will (Ol'): Go ahead and burn it down. Chuck (Zeke): That's the tagline of this podcast: Just go ahead and burn it down. Will (Ol'): So let's say I get it for a second, and then I trip. Scott (GM): Yeah. cuppycup (Bill): You do not want to trip in this room. Scott (GM): Well, I think then I want a d6 roll off each of you, because it's not just the fact that there's ether over everything here, but it's the fumes in the air. This is explosive. So I think in order to get out of here without being set on fire yourselves... Will (Ol'): I got a 5. cuppycup (Bill): I rolled a 3. Scott (GM): And I think it would be interesting if both of you failed, so I'm going to roll against you. Will (Ol'): Please do. I am all for that. Scott (GM): So I'm going to roll against Ollie at first. That's a 1. So Ollie's getting out. cuppycup (Bill): Oh boy. Scott (GM): Now for Bill. That's a 5. Bill: *laughs* Farewell. Scott (GM): So Ollie dives outside and you can see silhouetted in the doorway just this match striking and then the air catching fire all around his father, his hair is catching on fire, his clothing is catching on fire. cuppycup (Bill): Can Bill try to roll into that corner? Scott (GM): Well, I mean, Bill might have been able to go into that corner if he hadn't destroyed it. cuppycup (Bill): Oh, true. Will (Ol'): I'm going to go and try to stop it. I'm going to go and... Bill: You go on, Ollie. I'll be fine. Chuck (Zeke): You're going back in? Will (Ol'): I'm not going to watch my father die. Scott (GM): Oh, well, give me a roll then to see whether you can drag him out. And again, I think it'd be interesting if he failed. So I'm going to roll against you. Will (Ol'): That's a 1. I'm going to try again. Scott (GM): Oh, you'll have to roll your INSIGHT die. So roll 2 dice and make sure you know which one is your INSIGHT die. Will (Ol'): INSIGHT is the first one. Goddamnit, a 6. And the next one is also a 6. Hey. Scott (GM): Oh, OK. So you don't actually have to make an INSIGHT roll because they're tied there and I can't beat that, so I won't bother rolling against you. Actually, no, I can equal it and force a re-roll but I didn't, so. Yeah, you grab your father, his skin is burnt at this stage, his clothing is smoldering, his eyebrows are gone, his hair is just crispy. But you drag him out of the conflagration. Ol': What in the hell do you think you're doing? Chuck (Zeke): So glad that you brought him back out like he's going to live. It's 1890. Ol': What the hell do you think you're doing? Will (Ol'): I sound like Shaggy. *Shaggy voice* What the hell, Scoob? Bill: I tried, boy. I tried. Ol': We need to get to Bob. We need to get to Bob. Scott (GM): But I mean, after all that, let's see whether you actually recover any insight from that. *chuckle* So can Bill, give me an INSIGHT roll, please, just to see if you recover. cuppycup (Bill): Very gingerly. I'm going to roll INSIGHT. I got a goddamn 6. Everyone: *uproarious laughter* Chuck (Zeke): So you set yourself on fire and it didn't help. Scott (GM): No, it didn't. Not one bit. So the doctor's surgery is burning away merrily. It's a stone building so it won't burn down. Will (Ol'): Does anybody care? Scott (GM): Yeah, there are now a number of the townsfolk who are coming out, those who are at home and not out working. And yeah, fairly quickly they organize a bucket brigade and start getting buckets of water and passing them up. And in time, they do manage to put the fire out. The building itself doesn't collapse; it's a sandstone block building. So, you know, the structure itself is solid. But, yeah, all the materials in the surgery or the medicines that were in there, the tools, the records... Chuck (Zeke): The things that might have helped a burn victim. Scott (GM): Yeah, well, all of those are just completely gone. Will (Ol'): And Ollie, knowing that Mary and...I know that they didn't leave. Scott (GM): Well, actually, that's a good point. Let's cut back to Mary and Maggie and see what's going on. You know, you had run through a corner, ended up in this strange wooden shack where there was a man playing with a bowl, sitting beside a pile of rags. He looks rather wild; his hair is straggly, he's got an unkempt beard, his eyes are wide and fairly bloodshot, he's wearing the remains of tweed clothing that are just filthy and tattered. You know, like I say, the shotgun that he's pointing at you looks rusty. And here he was saying, Iain: *afraid* What are you doing in here? Scott (GM): Maggie has dropped to her knees and is looking at the pile of rags on the ground. And for a moment, she looks confused, and then you can see her mouth breaks open in the grin as she sees the main rag down on the ground. It's very faded and is filthy, but it looks like a child's red coat. Mary: Look, I'm not here to hurt or bother you. I just need to get my daughter and take her home. Iain: Who are you? What are you doing here? Scott (GM): You know, Maggie is cheerfully looking down at this. Maggie: Maeve? Maeve? Scott (GM): The man is looking over in some alarm, you can see that the bowl that he had on the ground or what you saw was the ball. I mean, you just see it out of the corner of your eyes, that's that's not a bowl. At least, it doesn't look like one. It's not right. But there's also the shotgun. That's very much the shotgun. Chuck (Zeke): There's very much a shotgun. cuppycup (Bill): It just occurred to me that I may have burned down their only exit. Chuck (Zeke): You burned down the wardrobe and now they're stuck in Narnia. Mary: Everything's going to be OK. My name is Mary and that's my daughter Maggie. I don't know what's going on. I won't tell anyone about this place. I just want to get my daughter and get out of your way. Iain: Does she know Maeve? Is she one of Maeve's little friends? Mary: I don't know. We just moved here. Scott (GM): Maggie looks round at you and she's grinning and nodding. Maggie: Maeve, yeah, my friend Maeve! Mary: Maggie, we need to get you out of here, baby. Let's go. I'm sorry if we bothered you, mister. Scott (GM): From outside the shack, you hear that *creepy giggle* sound again. Chuck (Zeke): Fucking Maeve. Alex (Mary): If he's distracted by the laugh, can I try to wrangle the shotgun away from him? Chuck (Zeke): Oh, that's a bold move. Scott (GM): OK, yeah, well, then that would be an opposed roll and this could be... Chuck (Zeke): Channeling some Ellie here. Scott (GM): This could be very, very dangerous. Alex (Mary): Oh, let's do it. Will (Ol'): She's also a 5 [INSIGHT] so she's not thinking straight here. Alex (Mary): I rolled a 2. Scott (GM): I rolled a 4. cuppycup (Bill): Yikes. Scott (GM): So, you jump at this man who's holding the shotgun and all of a sudden there is this almighty explosion, it deafens you, you can feel just burning pain across the side of your face and your shoulder. It's like being punched and burnt all at once. And, you know, just with that, you stagger for a moment, just clutching on. You can see Maggie out of the corner of your eye, screaming in terror. You can see the man look horrified at what he's done, looking at you, and you can feel the blood just running down, soaking into your dress. And just with that, you're reaching out for Maggie, reaching out for her... Everything goes black. Alex (Mary): Well, that's terrible. Scott (GM): We'll come back to you later. Alex (Mary): *nervous giggle* OK. Will (Ol'): Can you stop dying, Alex? Chuck (Zeke): Yeah. You can't be the first one out on every show. Alex (Mary): Dyin's the only way I know how to live, boys. Scott (GM): So, yeah, Zeke was running back towards the house. Is that right? Chuck (Zeke): Right. Scott (GM): OK. Chuck (Zeke): Zeke is a little scattered by this, but he has pieced together, like there's a lot of things flying around in his head and he's having difficulty holding on to all of them because he's losing a little bit of grip, but he's decided in his head that this whole thing is linked to what was going on in the woods. And he is just go into the woods. Scott (GM): OK. So, yeah... Chuck (Zeke): He's not even stopping at the house, just running into the woods to find his daughter and his wife. Scott (GM): So, yeah, you run into the woods and everything again is this deathly quiet. Everything is wrong. And yeah, almost immediately, you're not sure where you are. You're not sure if it's day or night and you're not sure how much time is passing outside. Maybe it's got dark again or maybe it's just the thick canopy of trees. And you can hear there's a wind blowing now between the branches of the trees and some of them rattling, and there's this odd buzzing sound that the trees are making. You can see the lights moving between the tree branches again as the wind picks up and whips up some of the pine needles from the ground, just stinging your eye, whipping at and stinging your skin. And which way did you come in? Was it back there? Or are you running back towards where you came in? That tree, that tree over there with the mark on it? That's the one you just passed a moment ago, but you didn't turn around. And the tree branches are now, they're whipping around up above and you can hear that buzzing and there's more of the lights around. And just again, that that sound of the girl's laughter echoing in here and you're staggering around and...give me a roll. Chuck (Zeke): OK. A roll is...a 6. Scott (GM): Fantastic! Chuck (Zeke): Is it? Scott (GM): So somehow, against the odds, you stagger out and you come into this clearing in the woods and suddenly all the wind just dies down and you're in a large clearing in the trees. There is this kind of ring of toadstools in the center of the clearing, there's this perfect ring of toadstools and there are these large, fleshy thing dripping strange liquid and you can smell an unpleasant smell coming from them. There's a sort of faint purple glow that's coming up through the bottom of them. But what perhaps seems even more important at this stage, you can see the bright sun above you now, brighter than when you came in and there, sitting against the tree on the edge of the clearing, on the far side, you can see Maggie. She's sitting there, just sitting against the tree, leaning back against it, her eyes closed, and there's a little trickle of blood running down her face. Chuck (Zeke): I run straight for Maggie. Scott (GM): OK. You go over and she's there on the ground and she looks pale, she looks bloodless. There is just this sticky blood on her face. And she she's sitting there just ever so still. Chuck (Zeke): I say, Zeke: Maggie, Maggie, are you awake? Are you OK? Scott (GM): She doesn't respond. cuppycup (Bill): Wake up, Maggie, I think I got something to say to you? Chuck (Zeke): *singing* Wake up, Maggie, I think I got something to say to you. Will (Ol'): This entire episode has just been leading up to that moment. Chuck (Zeke): Yeah. I yell out for Mary to see if she is around, because I was convinced they were still together. Scott (GM): No answer. And Maggie still sitting there just absolutely still and unmoving. Chuck (Zeke): OK, I pick up Maggie. Scott (GM): As you grab her and move her slightly, there's this sort of wet, slight noise of suction, like, you know, that noise that you make when you're opening your Tupperware or something like that, that sort of wet seal breaking. And the top of her head just slides off and lands on the ground. Give me an INSIGHT roll. Chuck (Zeke): Yeah, I should.That is a 4 and I was at 4. There's no way I'm OK with that. Scott (GM): No, no, you are still somehow holding it together. You are on the edge. I mean, that doesn't mean you're happy about the whole thing, but you're not completely losing it. But what's making this harder, perhaps, is what you can see inside as the top of the head falls off, just the the empty cavity inside her skull with the impossibly smooth rim where that top just fell off. Chuck (Zeke): Uh-huh. I feel like I keep running into situations where I cannot fathom what I could possibly do. There's going to be a scream of horror... Will (Ol'): You wanna do that for us, Chuck? Chuck (Zeke): I don't, but OK, but he's a little unhinged. I'm still taking her with me. Scott (GM): Yeah, OK. Are you taking the top of her head as well or just... Chuck (Zeke): I am. I am going to grab that. No, and I knew you were going to ask, and yes. Scott (GM): I was just checking! Chuck (Zeke): I'm grabbing the top of the head as well. And I'm going to quickly put it back on like it's going to stay. And I'm like,you're OK, honey, you're OK. And then I just sort of grab her and run back where I think I came from. But obviously, that doesn't go great. Scott (GM): We have to find out where you end up in a moment. Let's cut back briefly then to Mary. Chuck (Zeke): Let's! Scott (GM): You're not sure, Mary, how long you've been unconscious. You're lying there on the floor of this filthy shack... Chuck (Zeke): She did go to Ole Miss. Everyone: *laughs* As you come 'round, you try lifting your head up for a moment and you realize that it's half stuck to the floor boards, that there is congealing blood that is just pooled around your face. And as you try to lift your head, it's just this *slurping sound* as it kind of pulls away and yanks some of your hair out. And, you know, the crazed-looking man is still kneeling there looking at you, and also looking at you there, you can see there's Maggie. She's looking at you, just on her knees, just staring at you as you kind of open your eyes and start fighting back to consciousness. So she looks at you and says, Maggie: Are you dead? Mary: No, sweetie, I don't think so. Maggie: Oh, yes. I thought, yes, it can be difficult to tell sometimes. I still need to understand these things. Yes, you do seem to be functional. Alex (Mary): Can I try to sit up again? Scott (GM): Yeah. Alex (Mary): I assume the top of my head's been cut too, so we might as well find out if they're using it like a bowl. Everyone: *laughs* Scott (GM): No, you kind of push yourself up, and the top of your head is still mercifully intact. You can feel that... Chuck (Zeke): That was not for sure. Scott (GM): The left side of your face is a bloody mess. You sort of hesitantly put your hand up and you can feel that there isn't really much of your ear left anymore. Alex (Mary): Lovely. Scott (GM): And the rest of it just feels like mincemeat. The man looks at you and says, Iain: *panicked* Oh, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize that you were friends of Maeve's and I should have known. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Look, don't tell the fairies what I did. They won't like it. They won't like it. Mary: Who are the fairies? Iain: The fairies out there in the woods. The little people who live out there in the fairy ring. I mean, it's like, did you ever hear the story of Childe Roland? Of course, you haven't heard the story of Childe Roland. But it's like that, except it's not a kirk, it's a fairy ring. And you know, if you walk around three times, you'll be like Burd Ellen and you'll end up in fairyland. But it's not a kirk and it's not fairyland, but it's just like that. Mary: I just want to leave. Please tell me how to get out of here. Iain: You just go, don't you? You go. Only she can take you. Scott (GM): And he points at Maggie. Iain: She'll know the way. Alex (Mary): Can I follow Maggie, can I do that? Scott (GM): If you give any indication that you need help, Maggie comes over and helps you to your feet and she's got, as she grabs your hand and helps you up, there is this sort of vise-like grip. Her skin, it feels a bit wrong. It's i sort of cold and clammy and waxy as she's holding onto you, but she pulls you neatly up onto your feet. I mean, you're still dizzy and you can't see properly out of your left eye. Maybe your left eye is gone, you don't know. Alex (Mary): I'd like to leave now and not die. Scott (GM): OK. Mary: Maggie, will you help me get out of the cabin? Maggie: Where should we go? Where do we go now? Mary: We just need to get home. Do you know the way home, Maggie? Maggie: Is that the house just outside the woods? Mary: Yes. Don't you remember? It's our new house. Maggie: I know the way. Scott (GM): She says, and she starts leading you by the hand, this cold, clammy grip holding on as she leads you out. Every now and then when you feel dizzy and sweaty, she helps prop you up. And yeah, she slowly starts leading you out of Hobbes' Wood. Let's cut back to the father and son, the McDonalds, after their little conflagration. So, you know, obviously, Bill is fairly crispy at this stage and in a hell of a lot of pain. You do have medical supplies back at the house and God knows Zeke's got plenty of that pain medicine he's been selling, which, you know, is obviously snake oil, but it's also a fairly effective analgesic. Ol': *panicked* Somebody give me a carriage. We got to get him back to...We got to get him back. Scott (GM): One of the the local farmers who's helping out with the bucket brigade sort of looks at the two of you and you can see this look of almost pity on his face. And says, "yes, I've got a cart." PC Thorburn comes across and says, Thorburn: This is alright, Jimmy, I'll take them back. Just let me use your cart and I'll take them back. Ol': Mr. Thorburn, people are way too calm about what is going on here. Thorburn: You're not the first people in Cullingstone to have to try to understand these things, it's difficult on all of us. When this all happened to me, I thought I would die. My wife, she wasn't strong enough..she took my shotgun and, well, and now Annie is my responsibility and mine alone. Ol': What happened to Mr. Erskine's wife? Will (Ol'): I assume we are having this nice conversation as we load Bill onto a cart. Scott (GM): Yes, poor Moira, she...what happened to Lizzie all those years ago, that was hard on her as well. She never learned the lesson that I had to learn all that time back. You know, the only way of dealing with what is coming, what is happening to you all, is you have to try to love her as if she were your own. Ol': Bill, as soon as we get home, we are leaving. Is there a way to stop this, Thorburn? Thorburn: When the little people, the faries, whatever you want to call them, when they decide they're going to take a child, you can try to stop them, but if you get in their way, they'll destroy all of you. They'll kill all of you. They are cruel and merciless. If they want a child, they will take the child. Ol': Why Maggie? Thorburn: It's just what the fairies do. Every three years, they take another girl. When you bought Linty Farm, some people didn't want to sell it to you, some of the people in the town, others knew...you have to understand that they're going to take someone. And it's easier on us if it's an outsider, if someone comes in, if they have a child they can take. We knew they were going to take someone this year. And I'm sorry, you know, it was going to be your child or one of the village children. Bill: *wheezing* Bastards. I knew the price was too good to be true. Ol': So you sacrificed my niece, is what you're telling me. Thorburn: They took her. We did nothing. Will (Ol'): I'm just silent for the rest of the ride. I have to think about this. cuppycup (Bill): Silence sounds pretty good to Bill right now. Scott (GM): So, Zeke was carrying the body of Maggie out of the woods and so I think, you know, pretty much actually as the cart pulls up with PC Thorburn and Bill and Ollie, you see coming out of the woods walking towards you, the absolutely blood-drenched form of Zeke. And he is absolutely soaked in blood and is carrying this small limp figure in his arms. And you can see that there's something terribly wrong with the head. Ol': Zeke, what happened to Maggie? Chuck (Zeke): How successfully did I put the top of her skull back on? Scott (GM): Not even remotely. Chuck (Zeke): OK, so I got to assume you guys can see what's going on there. Scott (GM): Yeah, and I think I want everyone to make an INSIGHT roll. cuppycup (Bill): I rolled a 2. Will (Ol'): Alright, that is a 4. Scott (GM): OK. Will (Ol'): So I'm at 4 now. Scott (GM): OK. Ol': Maggie? What has happened to Maggie? Chuck (Zeke): I just drop to my knees and set her down, I think at this point it has probably set in that she's not going to make it. And then I am going to look and see if those needle marks are still on her abdomen. Scott (GM): Oh, yes. They're scabbed over, they haven't healed. But you can see the mark scabs around there. Chuck (Zeke): Rats, I was hoping this was some sort of fake. Scott (GM): And while you're doing all this, there's this shocked silence and, you know, Bill is obviously lying, drifting in and out of consciousness, covered in second and third degree burns. Chuck (Zeke): Family is doing well. Scott (GM): Yeah. And Zeke and Ollie are just looking at this mutilated form. Then a short while later, while you're all trying to process all this, you hear movement from the edge of the woods. Chuck (Zeke): I would like to listen and see if I can tell it's coming at us. Scott (GM): Yeah, it's footsteps. Will (Ol'): Can I scan the edge of the forest, as Ollie is wont to do? Scott (GM): Yeah. No roll necessary, you can see coming out through the trees, the first thing you see is the very sort of bloody, horribly damaged form of Mary. The left side of her face just looks like it's been through some kind of meat tenderizer. Her hair is matted in blood, there's blood soaked all into her dress. Her left eye is half out of the socket. There's there's just no trace of her left ear. Will (Ol'): Am...am I cool with this? Scott (GM): No, no, no. I think, you know, make an INSIGHT roll there. Will (Ol'): That's a 6. I'm at 5. Scott (GM): OK, then it goes up and I think Zeke probably should as well, as this is his wife. Chuck (Zeke): Yeah, probably so, it is my wife. That's a 5, so now I'm up to 5. Scott (GM): Fantastic. And I actually think Bill should make this roll as well. cuppycup (Bill): Oh, a 1. I rolled a 1 at last. Scott (GM): OK, yeah. She wasn't your favorite daughter, was she? cuppycup (Bill): Bill's eyes are pretty much welded shut, so he's not seeing much of this. Scott (GM): But then you see that she's holding someone's hand and kind of walking out from behind a tree, you know, almost half propping her up, you see Maggie come out as well. Maggie is walking out of the woods, sort of half holding her mother up and and and leading her towards you. Chuck (Zeke): And I also have Maggie. Scott (GM): Yes, you're looking down at the mutilated remains of your daughter and this Maggie is walking towards you, leading your swaying wife with her horribly damaged face. And this Maggie looks at you without any expression on her face and says, Maggie: Is this where we live? Chuck (Zeke): I, Zeke, am going to run over there without saying hello to Maggie. I'm going to run up to her and see if she also has the needle marks. Scott (GM): Yeah, you kind of open up her dress and as you do so, you can feel her skin is cold and clammy and there are no marks on her stomach, and you look down and there isn't even the navel there. No belly button. There's just this smooth white waxy skin. And she again in this flat voice, she says, Maggie: Are you trying to hurt me? Do you want to kill me? Scott (GM): Let's have an INSIGHT roll. Chuck (Zeke): Let's. Come on, no whammy. Ok, that's a 2. I'm still holding on. Scott (GM): OK. Mary is obviously participant to all this. So I think you get to make an INSIGHT roll as well. Chuck (Zeke): Yeah honey, we INSIGHT roll as a family. Alex (Mary): I rolled 4. Scott (GM): OK, what's your INSIGHT at the moment? Alex (Mary): 5. Scott (GM): OK, so it stays on 5, so you're all holding it together. Chuck (Zeke): So I'm at a 5, which is what? We would describe that is brink of madness? Scott (GM): Yes. Yeah, basically, one stiff breeze and you're toppling. Chuck (Zeke): And...I don't know if I want to do this. What I was about to say was so unpleasant that I don't know if I can get it out of my mouth. Scott (GM): Oh, go for it. I think the situation warrants it, whatever it is. Chuck (Zeke): In order to reduce myself from a 5, I need to destroy the evidence of my madness, right? Scott (GM): Yeah. Chuck (Zeke): And right or wrong, Zeke is convinced this is not his daughter, which means he would need to destroy his daughter. And I know it sounds insane... Scott (GM): So what would Zeke attempting to destroy his daughter look like? Chuck (Zeke): I don't want...this is the path I didn't want to go done. I'm full of regret right now. cuppycup (Bill): You stepped on that rusty hoe when you're walking over, maybe. You could use that. Chuck (Zeke): We're going to start off with me screaming at her to be gone. Scott (GM): And she just looks at you again with those blank eyes and says, Maggie: Why are you angry at me? Have I done something wrong? Should I modify my behavior? What do you expect me to do? Chuck (Zeke): I grab Mary and I say, Zeke: This is not our daughter. Mary: What do you mean, it's not her? Of course it's her. Look at her. Zeke: It's not...it's not her. Look at her. Touch her. Mary: She's been with me the whole time. She helped me. If she's not Maggie, then where is Maggie? Zeke: Well, about that, um...don't look over there. She's not... Scott (GM): I think as you involuntarily look over there at the mutilated remains of your daughter's corpse lying on the ground, that's probably a good opportunity for Mary to make another INSIGHT roll. Alex (Mary): I rolled a 3. Still hanging in there. Scott (GM): OK. Yeah, you are still on the ropes. cuppycup (Bill): While all of this is happening, can Bill just do one more thing? Scott (GM): Oh, yes. Chuck (Zeke): *laughs* Oh, yes. cuppycup (Bill): OK, Bill has some matches left and he's rediscovered those in his coat pocket. The logical thing for Bill to do in his current condition is to burn the House down, I think. Scott (GM): OK, so while everyone else is out there in the garden having this rather intense interchange, the badly burned form of Bill, he pretty much has to peel himself off the cart, leaving bits of skin behind, and is limping over to the house, and while the rest of you are having this discussion about Maggie and what all this means, you can start to smell smoke and you can see flames now licking from the windows of the house behind you. Chuck (Zeke): We've only been here for like 24 hours, right? We went crazy and burned this house down in a hurry. cuppycup (Bill): The insurance claims investigator shows up immediately. Scott (GM): Maggie looks over at it, looks up at Mary and says, Maggie: Does this mean we need somewhere else to live now? Mary: I think so, sweetie. Will (Ol'): Ol' is going to run in. cuppycup (Bill): Oh? Run in? Chuck (Zeke): Run in, he said. Will (Ol'): I don't know why. Chuck (Zeke): Maybe quit saving your crazy father. Scott (GM): Yeah, well this time, I don't think there's any saving him, because if you run into the burning building you realize that what has happened this time is that your father hasn't just gone around splashing lamp oil everywhere; what he's done is he splashed the lamp all over himself, set himself on fire and is now just staggering through the house, leaving trails of fire everywhere he's going. Will (Ol'): Alright, I'm leaving. cuppycup (Bill): Maybe grab a sandwich or some cake on the way out. Chuck (Zeke): And I yell at Maggie number 2 that no, she does not live with us. Scott (GM): She holds onto Mary's hand and looks up at Mary and says, Maggie: Can I live with you? Chuck (Zeke): I say, Zeke: Mary, this is not our daughter. Begone, demon! Scott (GM): But she's still holding onto your hand. Mary: Of course you'll live with us. Chuck (Zeke): I like that. Will (Ol'): Ollie is just going to go sit at the front of the driveway and just sit down and think. Ollie tries to process and put things together, that's why he was grilling Thorburn. And I want to say Everley, but it's not Everyley, I don't know I wanna keep calling him Everley. Scott (GM): Erskine. Will (Ol'): Why he was grilling Erskine and Thorburn. He's just going to sit down and piece puzzles together and it just isn't clicking. Scott (GM): But somehow, as you're doing that, they're still echoing through your head, those words of advice Thorburn offered to you on the cart ride back, which is you need to love her as if she was your own. Will (Ol'): Is Thorburn...Where's Thorburn? Scott (GM): Thorburn is basically standing by the car at this stage. He is just watching all of this play out. Will (Ol'): I'm going to go walk to Thorburn. Ol': Why do we need to love her? Thorburn: She will never let you go. She is yours, she's. She's going to be yours to bear now, at least... Scott (GM): He points over at Zeke and May. Thorburn: Or at least theirs. They have to learn how to live with her. She won't let them go now. If they try, it might be dangerous. Chuck (Zeke): So, in an effort again to...I'm just going to get through this and not think about how unpleasant it is. I'm at a 5, and in order to reduce my sanity, I need to destroy...I still have that garden hoe. Scott (GM): I mean, you'd need to walk over towards the shed and pick it up. Chuck (Zeke): And then I'm gonna take a swing at fake Maggie. Scott (GM): OK, so, while you're having this conversation with PC Thorburn and while Mary is standing there holding Maggie's hand, you see Zeke walk over to one of the outbuildings, just pick up a hoe and then come back and just swing at Maggie. Yeah, Maggie does not put up any resistance. I won't to ask you to roll for this. The hoe comes down and just cuts open the side of her head, and you can see this white waxy skin part, and there underneath, you can see something black and chitinous, and it's just wriggling inside as it begins to seal up again. And give me an INSIGHT roll for start. Chuck (Zeke): That's a 2. Scott (GM): OK, so you have not managed to destroy it, but you have also not managed to go insane in the process. However, you do remember what I told you about the rules for combat at the very beginning of this. Chuck (Zeke): I do. Scott (GM): So yeah, Maggie looks at you, almost in surprise as this white waxy skin knits up on the side of her head. And yes, she grabs the hoe off you and without any emotion at all, the rest of you just see her take the hoe and ram it through Zeke's throat. There is a gout of blood, his neck snaps back, his head snaps back. His body convulses for a few moments as she's holding the hoe up, keeping the body propped up. And then the body just drops the ground. And she just looks up at Mary and says, Maggie: Will you look after me now? Mary: Yes, I'll take care of you, sweetie. Scott (GM): And shall we leave it there? "Last Goodbye" by Eric Kinney, sung by Danica Dora: Shadows in the sky, footsteps in the night behind me. Target's in their sites, running out of light to save me. Red moon on the rise, you say your last good night, while I keep getting by. Scott (GM): What I would like is for those surviving members of the family, so that would be Mary and Ollie, to perhaps give me a little codas of how their lives progressed from this point onwards now that you have this very new and very different Maggie in your midst. cuppycup (Bill): I'm so glad I'm dead. Will (Ol'): I feel like Ollie wants to do two things: he wants to run away, because he has no ties to this. Scott (GM): Yeah. Chuck (Zeke): Man, you are the worst uncle. Will (Ol'): Yeah, let me say, but, Alex (Mary): I'm your sister. Will (Ol'): You didn't let me say but! But he doesn't leave Mary by herself. Alex (Mary): Well, I'm not living with you, so. Will (Ol'): You're not? Alright, well, Mary, actually, Mary, I want you to say first because... Scott (GM): Yeah. Alex (Mary): Mary and the new Maggie end up settling in the town, living by themselves, Mary becomes the head teacher at the school and fake Maggie and fake Lizzie become best friends, and that's just how they live. Chuck (Zeke): Aww, that's kind of sweet. Scott (GM): Well, I mean, quite often Lizzie comes round and visits Maggie and you hear them have these strange conversations where they will just stand in darkened rooms together, their mouths open, and they don't use words to communicate. There are these strange buzzing noises that just echo backwards and forwards and fill the air like a swarm of angry bees. But it seems to make them happy. Alex (Mary): If they're happy, that's all that matters. Scott (GM): Oh, that's as happy as they ever get. They never actually show any emotion. Will (Ol'): So Mary is basically in denial. Ol' McDonald is going to talk to PC Thorburn, and I'm going to ask him one question. Ol': Are you happy? Scott (GM): He just looks at you and he almost laughs for a moment. Thorburn: Happy? Does anyone here look happy? We live, we survive. We learn how to deal with this. We learn how to cope. But happy? There's no happiness here. Ol': That's all I need to hear. Will (Ol'): Ol' MacDonald, he's going to go to the farm where Mary is. With a shotgun. While Mary's asleep. cuppycup (Bill): Oh, Jesus. Will (Ol'): He's going to put his sister out of her misery and run away. Alex (Mary): You could have just run away without killing me. cuppycup (Bill): Damn you, Ollie. Will (Ol'): Because I don't want my sister to have to live this life. Alex (Mary): You're not giving her any agency to choose the life she wants. Will (Ol'): Yeah, because I'm insane. Scott (GM): Well, I think actually, rather than just narrate this, let's put this down to an opposed roll. Because I think, you know, even if you're doing it while Mary's asleep, Maggie never sleeps. She is going to want to protect her mother because there is so much more data she could gather from her from her mother's behavior. And so, yes, let's have that opposed roll. Will (Ol'): That's a 3. Scott (GM): I rolled a 3 as well. We need to reroll. Will (Ol'): That's a 6. Scott (GM): I rolled a 3 again. OK. cuppycup (Bill): Oh no. Scott (GM): Well, the good news is, you do manage to blow your sister's head off. I mean, that's the good part. Chuck (Zeke): That's the good news? The good news, to clarify, was that you killed your sister. Scott (GM): The bad news is, I think, on that 6, even in your state of heightened madness, you do just realize the full ramifications of what you've done here,that this wasn't a mercy killing, that you just murdered her in cold blood. So I think that calls for an INSIGHT roll. Will (Ol'): That's a 6. Scott (GM): Then I think, you know, it's the last surviving member of the family then, as your mind goes, we sort of leave it then, perhaps, with this image of this young man and this young girl traveling now on a steamer back towards the U.S. They're sitting there, they're holding hands across a dining table. You know, obviously, Maggie's not eating anything, but she is just staring intently at everything that's going on. And she says, Maggie: Tell me again what things we will see in the new land. I have so much to report. cuppycup (Keeper): You are listening to Ain’t Slayed Nobody. For ad-free episodes, heaps of bonus content, and special programming please join our posse at patreon.com/aintslayed or subscribe to Ain’t Slayed Nobody+ at Apple Podcasts. See the show notes for full credits, and help us grow by posting friendly reviews and spreading the word to your friends and followers. Thank you and good luck out there!